Every Friday, I feature something written by one of my fellow bloggers at Patheos, a web portal devoted to religion and spirituality, or by another blogger/writer whose work I admire. This week I am discussing Christian Piatt’s new memoir as part of a book club discussion hosted by Patheos. Our recent trip south for my mother-in-law’s funeral reinforced something I know all too well but prefer to ignore most of the time: My children’s genetic legacy includes a fair amount... Read more
A mother, mother-in-law, aunt, grandmother, and great-grandmother dies, and we gather. We walk through Ruby’s house, running our hands along the dresser tops and counters and armchairs that witnessed her raising five children, cooking thousands of meals, going over the books for the business she built with her husband, making and receiving phone calls from the family and friends who gave her life its heft and texture. They witnessed also the far too many calls Ruby made or received sharing... Read more
On Monday morning, May 14, my mother-in-law, Ruby Kimrey Dollar, died. Which makes my husband an orphan (his dad died of colon cancer in 1988). I cannot speak for what my husband is feeling, and in fact, he may be trying to figure that out for some time to come. We’ve lived in Connecticut—a 14-hour drive from Daniel’s childhood home in North Carolina—for 13 years now. For the first 10 or so of those years, we got down to North... Read more
Yesterday, Sandra Glahn (co-author of several books on infertility with Dr. William Cutrer) featured a Q&A with me about my book, No Easy Choice, on her blog. Check it out here. Read more
It is a constant bloggerly temptation to feel that I have to weigh in on every news story that either 1) has to do with one of my core topics (parenting, disability, ethics, faith) or 2) I feel strongly about. (This is part of what I was writing about in my post about the “Tyranny of the News Hook,” which was recently reposted on the Redbud Writers Guild blog). This past week’s temptations have included President Obama’s laudable decision to... Read more
Let’s be clear: I do not “do” parenting books. I don’t read books about how to be a better mother (or, for that matter, how to follow a menu plan that will make me feel 10 years younger, or how to know God better). In my experience, self-help/advice books don’t really change me for the better. What kind of books do change me? Absorbing novels. Beautifully written, honest memoirs. My favorite writing about motherhood is about as far from self-help... Read more
As Amy Julia Becker so eloquently wrote in her review of my book last week, and as I further explained in the comments section of that review, considering the ethical questions raised by reproductive technology in the context of real people’s stories is hard but important work. Stories illuminate, and they complicate. As I said in a comment to Amy Julia’s review: The young adult novelist Gary Schmidt, in his keynote address at the recent Festival of Faith and Writing,... Read more
As I explain in the About Me section of this blog, I wear a number of labels that don’t always go together naturally. Like “evangelical” and “Episcopalian.” Mostly, I would like to not be terribly concerned about labels. I’d like people who claim faith in Jesus Christ to be able, willing, and eager to hang out with each other, talk to each other, and accept each other as members of the same family, no matter whether we worship in a... Read more
One week. That’s how long our latest adopted rescue dog lasted in our home. One. Stinkin’. Week. The problem? Essentially the same problem we had with our last rescue dog—an anxious, possessive personality that was putting the children in our lives at risk of being bitten. Despite spending several hours a day doing various training exercises, it became clear to us that Cooper is, like our last dog Eddie, a fundamentally good and sweet dog who belongs in a home... Read more
Ellen Painter Dollar
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Do I Hate My Life? No. But I Do Hate My Disability.
Thomas, a reader who has the same bone disorder I do (osteogenesis imperfecta, or OI) commented on my contention in Friday’s post that I hate OI. Thomas wrote, “It’s really hard to read this and not feel sad for you…To me hating an almost immutable element about one’s body is kind of living with perpetual hate.” I responded to Thomas in the comments to that post, but thought his point was worth a post of its own. Does hatred of... Read more