To Coven, or Not to Coven…

To Coven, or Not to Coven… November 5, 2023

I watched an interesting conversation between a couple of friends on one of my recent social media posts. It all started with a meme and ended in a discussion on covens.

The meme itself, I feel, was speaking to the freedom and personal journey of witchcraft, and the spirituality one may hold with it. The ability to craft our path and beliefs based upon our own experiences. Not having to conform to another’s, or a set of dogmatic rules that place limitations upon us.

I am acutely aware of that need to “find your own way” “what works for you” because I am a results based witch. I understand some things that work for me, may not work for others in the same way. The way I view a certain energy or element may not be how another views it, so our work will look different with it. I feel there is a beauty in that we should embrace.

This kind of thinking also drives the way I teach. I find I repeat this over and over to mentees and people in my Death’s Emissary course “What I am teach is structures and skills – How you apply them and use them is going to be very individual to you. It requires experimenting with them, out-of-the-box thinking, and finding what works for you.”

Cookie Cutter, mass production beliefs/ practices, tend to box us in and limits our abilities. With that being said, it is hard to get people past that kind of thinking. We are so used to it in our society – the whole “this is the instructions for how this is done, just follow it” motif. I have met many people who just want me to tell them the steps of how to do something, not the reasoning behind those steps in order for them to see the bigger picture and discover their own way of doing it.

Covens

What gave me pause, was when their discussion turned to Covens. They seemed to be looking at covens through a very narrowed lens. I can understand why, because most of what we hear about, and many have experienced, is the Domination Model of a coven. Where the few select people who control it, do so in a manner of gaining power over the others. They take that leadership to a place that is about serving themselves instead of the coven as a whole. It is an age old story that can be found in any power structure.

I used to think that was all covens, because that is what I would run into all the time. It isn’t though. There are many styles of covens.

In the beginning I think covens were more like family structures. A co-operative between a small group of people. They come together and work together for a similar goal or outcome. Each having their own skill sets and talents, that when blended together, created a powerful force to alter and change things. I am sure there was a leader or head (perhaps 2 or 3) to organize and keep the flow of the group moving, similar to parents in a family unit. They were there to help guide, share their experience, and encourage the others to find their own path.

Because of the power structures we are used to in society, the hierarchies we see everywhere, have become a common model of groups – I think this is why we saw a shift in what covens were perceived as. Over time, it is also what many became. The Power and Domination structure and less the family type structure.

Different Coven Structures

As those types of structure models are being broken down in society, being rebelled against, I think the rise of more co-operative, family like structured covens are gaining more footing and popularity.

I have heard about some covens who take an equal approach. This means everyone in the coven has equal say in what goes on in the coven and they take turns being “in charge.” This can range from being responsible for certain rituals, to each month one person is responsible for certain tasks or leadership duties. So they spread out the power of leadership across all members.

Some covens are more learning based. They get together to share their experiences, learn from each other. They take turns running classes, discussion groups, and so forth. The focus for them isn’t so much doing magic or magical work together, but deepening their own practices and creating connections.

There are covens where they are there to specifically do magical work together. They all follow their own paths individually, with some shared core elements that bring them together as a group. They come together as a coven to celebrate sacred days, perform rituals or spells on a larger scale, and may do some sharing between them. The bulk of the members life and work though is as a solitary.

Some may hold a more traditional set-up, a hierarchy system, to ensure the safety of the members, the direction of the coven and work being done there, and so forth – but instead of one or two members controlling everything, they have more of a council or Board type of a set-up. Specific people have certain jobs or oversee certain aspects of the coven, and together as a group they run the coven.

Then there is also just the super old-school type of coven where it is just a few friends getting together and doing magic together.

In the end, I think the size of the coven and the purpose it is being created for will determine how they decide to structure it. The bigger the group, the more voices and differing opinions, the more structure I think needs to happen in order to keep the group on task and flowing in a forward direction. This doesn’t mean it has to mimic the societal power structures, but there does have to be leadership. Perhaps there is a better way, but I have not seen it yet.

Walking

Secrecy in Covens

Secrecy in covens is a consistent argument that I see. People complaining that the covens don’t just openly share all their aspects and works to the public at large. I get this kind of thinking because I used to say the same thing. It can from a place of being sick of people hoarding and lording knowledge over others – not just in the magical community, but the world at large. So many secrets…

As I grew older, and grew in my own practices and wisdom, I began to understand different reasons as to why the secrecy was a thing – and it wasn’t for the reasons I had imagined. I am sure some use it in the other way (the domination) but there are other aspects to consider.

From a Learning Perspective

One of the biggest considerations came as I decided to mentor and teach more. First of all, if I gave them everything up front, they would not understand it. We learn by understanding and experimenting with foundational information. Once we have good foundations, we can add and build more on top of them. People have a tendency to want to look at the back of the book first, to see where it ends, and by doing so will create a perception that can alter how they perceive all the other information.

It can also be overwhelming to people. If I handed you a huge math book, starting with addition and ending in calculus, and you had never experienced math yet – you would probably get overwhelmed and freak out about the enormity of the task ahead. But given in bite sized bits, that build upon the skills you learn in each, you fall into an easy rhythm that allows you to learn and grow.

Entitlement

There is a sense of entitlement in that statement, that you should share everything – that all the information should be put out for public consumption. I also find it amusing that the same people I hear saying it often, are also ones who support closed practices. So my questions becomes – What is the difference for you?

Much of what happens in a coven when it comes to sharing and work, comes from their own personal practices. There may be a spell or type of magic that they have created and worked on – experimenting – testing – and perfecting over years. It is something they are using and sharing within their coven, but that does not entitle the people outside of that coven access o that work. It is their work, and they can choose to keep it for themselves, just as a solitary can choose to keep their work for themselves.

Levels Within Covens

This equates back to the learning aspects but also the mysteries.

Many covens will have different “levels” within them. Once you have mastered certain skills and concepts, then you move up into the next level. Much of this has to do with what we discussed in the Learning section above – Building solid foundations and then expanding and building structures on-top of them.

This type of leveling also provides a sense of mystery and achievement for members.

As they master each level, they gain a sense of accomplishment. Too often we do not realize how much we have grown over a period of time, because those changes happen slowly, day by day. Through the ceremony of movement, and celebrating those achievements, it helps us to realize just how much growth has truly happened. It is also something that is celebrated by the whole coven – giving us that recognition for the achievements we have worked so hard for.

The mystery aspect can be equated to the concept of Hope. Because you may know a generalization of each level, you have a vague idea as to the structure, but they are also shrouded in deep mystery for those who have not achieved the level yet. The same way Hope can drive us forward through our storms – the need and drive to discover the mysteries ahead can help us move through the challenging and difficult times in learning.

There is mystery in magic. Secrets to discover, hidden knowledge to unlock, and the unknown always ahead of us. For some, covens are also like this. Bringing the beauty of mystery to a real place that is shared with others close to them. They know that every level they move, is another stage of uncovering and exploring newer and deeper mysteries.

13 Signs

Covens Create Community

In the end, for my perspective, Covens are a community of like-minded, similar belief, or similarly magicked people. They can relate to, and understand, the experiences you are sharing because they have experienced similarly, or are going through it with you. This is a huge plus, since many have difficulty sharing due to others not understanding or believing we experienced something. If they do not believe or understand the magic, then they can not help you with it.

At the core, I think Covens create magical communities, that understand our experiences, that can support and encourage each other, and help guide each other when needed.

The same as if you were a part of a group that focused on chess – People all passionate about, and knowledgeable of, the game of chess in particular. Coming together to grow, share, and gain more experience and perspectives of the game. The more they learn, the higher their skill level, the more they can do within that community. Their love of chess is what drew them – what they personally gain from the community aspect (higher learning and friendship) is what keeps them coming back.

In the End

I get why there is some leery feelings when Covens enter the conversation – but most of that is driven by a stereotype that only focuses on one type of Coven and not all. Yes, some are bad – some end up going bad – but many others do not.

Some are very small and selective, because intimate relationships are important to them, and a smaller group is easier to harmonize. Some are huge with thousands of people, and online -open to select people or anyone who sign up, depending on their set up. Some will have levels you need to work through, and some may just have workshops you can take. Some work big magic together – Some just celebrate together.

Covens come in all shapes and sizes – all kinds of different structures – but the one things they all provide on some level is community and friendship for those who seek it.

It is perfectly fine to always be a solitary and never get involved with a coven. This is your path, your life, and you can choose for yourself. Covens are there for those who are seeking out a different path for themselves, or to add to their path and growth. There is no right or wrong way – just the way that works for you.

About Esa
Author, Oracle, Guide, and Teacher of the Death's Emissary/ Death Doula course. "You are building your own path, your own connections, and shaping your own destiny. We can inspire others through sharing - we can Guide through our own experiences - but each of us must walk our own path." *some links in these articles may be associated with amazon You can read more about the author here.
"dont need magic, white or black, it all originates with the same source !"

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