Is not the entire nation bummed about Bill Cosby today?
Now that I’m in my late forties (almost), I don’t keep up with pop culture much. I don’t have modern day actors and actresses I adore, look up to, or idolize. But back in the 80’s, when I was growing up, Bill Cosby was just about every teenager’s idol and … uhhh, I guess we’ll call it substitute dad.
Some of us were being raised by good fathers, but in the teen years, strife happens in the parent/child relationship. Even amongst Doctor Heathcliff Huxtable and his kids, there was tension. But we could come home, experience tension with our own fathers, retreat to our room or basement, and watch fictional strife that somehow took our real life strife and made it bearable. Maybe even funny.
Yes, that’s it. He made it possible to laugh at ourselves. Our parents. Our domestic situations.
Today, nobody’s laughing. From what I read, Bill Cosby is ticked about being convicted, about being considered a flight risk, and about the upcoming reality of being treated like a prisoner (although we all know his cell will be … cushy). Those he abused have been understandably ticked for decades. And those of us watching today and for decades are ticked because we feel betrayed.
It all makes me wonder why and how we get so attached to public figures. I’ve never spoken to or seen Bill Cosby in my entire life. I’m willing to bet that ninety-nine point nine, nine, nine percent of my readers haven’t either. Yet here we all are, weeping for our make-believe father.
I don’t have answers to my own question. Humans have always succumbed to people worship, when really, the only Person to ever deserve our worship is Christ – and yet, we crucified Him. So, we are not the best judge of character, are we? That fact alone makes me wonder how well the jury judged. Could they have wrongly convicted the long-time, well-known, well-loved comedian? Were those accusing Cosby of sexual misconduct talented actresses themselves, and were they solely after monetary gain? Was the judge fair? Or did the judge have an ulterior motive of promoting the #MeToo movement and making a nation-wide, highly publicized statement that women will no longer tolerate being groped, drugged, and taken advantage of sexually?
The answer is:
I don’t know.
And neither do you.
We know bits and pieces of each side of the story. But we were not there. The judge was not there. The jury was not there. The only people on earth who know the truth and nothing but the truth about whether the hanky panky that went on was consensual or forced are Billy Cosby and his accusers.
Having said that, the jury has spoken. They know gobs more than you or I know. And so, we must accept the fact that they sat through hour upon hour of testimony and evidence, and additionally took another fourteen hours to finally conclude that Cosby was indeed guilty of sexual assault.
We must also accept that Bill Cosby and his wife claim the evidence was overlooked, and that Cosby remains innocent.
I have a sneaking suspicion most Americans will come to a verdict of their own. It is our nature to do so, and we will be biased. Maybe because we are male. Maybe because we are female. Maybe because we’ve personally been sexually assaulted, and we wish to see such atrocities fought against. I’m in that camp. I’ve experience the assault, and I want someone to put a stop to it. Like, thousands of yesteryears ago.
Still, being a woman and all, I know that none of us in the double X chromosome camp are perfect. Our motives are not always pure and spotless. We are sinners, just like those in the XY camp. Just like Bill Cosby. So, just because the accuser is a woman, and just because that woman says she was assaulted, does not make it so. In 2006, Andrea Constand settled with Cosby for over three million George Washingtons. Except, apparently, things in her mind were not settled at all. The settlement itself is perhaps more indicative of Cosby’s guilt or innocence. Who would pay out that much money if they weren’t guilty and didn’t highly desire to keep their guilt quiet?
Not I.
But then, I don’t have millions to spare.
What I’m getting at is that the Bill Cosby case is a tangled web, woven a long, long time ago. I know what it’s like to want to take someone to court for sexaul assault decades after it happened. The assault is almost impossible to prove. No, in most cases, it is impossible to prove. It’s usually a case of he said, she said, if any time at all has passed. Of course, not everyone can afford a Gloria Allred, and I highly suspect her presence and expertise played a role in the outcome of the trial.
You see what’s happened. People -rich people- have duked it out, and the one with the most money lost. Maybe because he’s guilty. Maybe because this was a great opportunity for feminists to crucify a high-profile individual in order to make their point.
Indeed … the tangled web we weave.
In my heart, I want Bill Cosby to be innocent. Also in my heart, I want to believe that no fellow double X-er would ruin a high profile person to make a point. That is not the way to make a point. The way to make a point is:
Do seek justice on earth. God has given us government and a justice system just for that purpose. If Bill Cosby did it, he deserves to be locked up so he can’t do it again. But ultimately … realize that God has said “Vengeance is mine, I will repay.”
At times, it feels like that doesn’t quite cut it, right? Why would leaving vengeance to Someone else be beneficial?
I’ve asked the same question, because as I said, I don’t have a Gloria Allred. I’ve no money. I’ve no evidence. I’ve nuthin’ but my word against his. Therefore, I have no choice but to leave my abuser in the hands of God Almighty.
Almighty.
Do we know the power of God? Do we understand what the vengeance of God looks like? Do we understand that God, in His infinite knowledge and perfection is able to dole out the best judgment on an unrepentant sinner?
Do we remember what the Lord said about those who “offend little children”? He said it would be better for them if a millstone were hung around their neck, and they were thrown into the sea. (Mark 9:42)
That’s infinitely more just than a cushy jail cell, in my opinion.
As for me and my personal sexual assault case, I have left judgment with the Lord. If I could do it over again, I would’ve sought earthly justice decades ago. If not for myself, for those who my abuser almost assuredly went on to abuse after me. He was just that kind of guy. A womanizer. A manipulator. A con-man, especially where little girls barely out of the tween years were concerned. He was everything dozens of women are accusing Cosby of today, sans drugs.
Whatever the whole truth is concerning the Cosby case, it leaves me sad and angry and otherwise emotionally triggered. Still, I choose to leave ultimate judgment for all involved to the Lord, because He’s all-knowing, wise, perfectly just, and good.
And frankly, humans are not.