“Don’t take “no” from someone who can’t give you ‘yes.'” – Eleanor Roosevelt.
Picture a corporate assistant whose job it is to screen the big CEO’s calls. They were hired to say ‘No’ and saying ‘Yes’ is not really an option. If yes is not an option, then no doesn’t really mean anything, does it? It’s what everybody gets. If you want to reach the big CEO, you have to find a way around that assistant.
For many people – pastors, parents, friends – ‘no’ is the default setting on LGBTQ issues.”No, your child is not welcome here.” “No, it is not okay to let your child still live in your home if they are gay.” “No, if you are gay, you cannot be a member of this church.” “No, we will not have a group of parents of gay children in our church.” “No, we will not even discuss this issue.” “No, your gay child cannot hang out with my child.”
Here’s the deal… they cannot give you a ‘yes’, so their ‘no’ means nothing.
I asked a Southern Baptist friend if it was possible that she was wrong on the LGBTQ issue, if it was even possible she had misinterpreted any of the Bible on this topic.
She said “No. It’s not possible.”
In that case, there is no reason even to talk about it. She likely would not see a yes if God showed it to her, because her mind is made up.
Someone has to be willing to talk – and to pray – with an open mind, an open heart, to hear anything other than what they already think. I had to let go in that relationship, and let God reveal or not reveal anything new to my friend, if she becomes willing to hear.
If the person is not willing to even consider saying “yes” – you can dismiss their “no.”
So what do you do if you can’t reach that CEO, or the Pastor of your church? Go around the assistant, go around the pastor, and talk to God directly. Let the Spirit of God lead you. Trust God to tell you what you need to know, what you need to do.
Talk to someone who has considered the matter more thoroughly, from someone for whom yes and no were both options. Talk to someone who has already gone down the journey you are on.
The truth is, many pastors have searched out an answer with an open heart, willing to hear a yes OR a no from God. And guess what? More and more, those pastors seem to be finding a yes.
God is moving, God is working, God is bringing around a new paradigm.
We are in a revolution, and people will not go back to the old way on this, no matter how many people are stuck on “no.”
Because many of us, far too many to retreat, are hearing God say, “Yes!”