The Bible is Not a Bag of Trail Mix


My social media has been burning up with opinions ever since the court ruling on Marriage Equality. Yours too? The opinions won’t change things; it is now the law of the land. But perhaps opinions can change how we receive Marriage Equality, how we engage with LGBTQ people about it, how we engage in loving as Christ told his followers to love.The Bible is not trail mix from which we pick and choose. So what is it? How do faithful, earnest Jesus followers approach the Bible? I’m sincere when I … [Read more...]

“The Church is Killing Its Gay Children” – The Deadly Results of Shame

PALMER shame

Shame. It says, “There is something fundamentally wrong with you.” It is the lie at the very root of our identity. If I did something wrong, I can apologize and make amends. But if I am fundamentally wrong, what hope do I have?Our greatest need is to be loved, to belong, to be accepted as we are. Shame says the exact opposite – that we do not fit in, are not acceptable as is and, fundamentally, are not lovable. Shame is the fundamental lie that keeps us separate, and it wreaks havoc in self- … [Read more...]

A Warning Label For The Bible


This needs to be said. This may open the floodgates to break people free from the damage and bondage of the law-focused, behavior-focused, fundamental, religious, non-affirming church.Jim Rigby, a Pastor, theologian, and one of the bravest, boldest men I know, has the guts to say it - and I want to share it with you today.  This was a simple, powerful, poignant, and potentially life-changing post Jim made on Facebook. I love the Bible and study it most days, but the Bible is not intended to … [Read more...]

It’s Family Vacation. Everyone’s Here and Having Fun. Except Her.


You lie to the kids about why she is not here. It's the family vacation and everyone's here and having fun... except her. She is not welcome. Why?? Because she is gay.My heart goes out to those who have been left out, left behind and have had to deal with this kind of horrible pain and rejection from the people who are supposed to love you the most.And my dismay and anger goes out to the parents who reject their child like this, and who commit many sins to pull off this kind of charade - … [Read more...]

Gays & The Call to Celibacy: My Reaction to Julie Rodgers

Julie Rodgers, Susan Cottrell, Liz Dyer

I am proud of Julie Rodgers.  She was on staff at Wheaton College and committed to life-long celibacy for LGBTQ. I’m so proud that she has changed her mind, changed her heart and that she has just come out as “supportive of same-sex relationships."In her courageous shift, Julie has dealt honestly with her own heart, and she’s dealt authentically with people’s lived experience and the consequences of the unlove that denies the gay reality.I found Julie’s talks early on in my journey of adv … [Read more...]

The absurdity of Straight Pride


Someone posted this very clever little meme: Straight Pride. See what they did there?Here’s the thing: Straight Pride is superfluous. Straight is the dominant narrative. Straight people as a class have never been persecuted. Straight people take being straight for granted.Why would we need to express a special pride to be straight when straight people have never been persecuted because they’re straight?Can you just imagine the outcry that would ensue if straight people were subjected … [Read more...]

Dear Susan: God Tells Us To Judge Each Other… Right?


Are we supposed to judge each other?  Doesn't God tell us to do that? Aren't we supposed to speak into each other's lives?Another "hot button" topic for today's "Dear Susan" - let's do it.  : )I write these on most Fridays. Sometimes they will be poignant, sometimes thought-provoking, sometimes tender, sometimes funny… but hopefully always worth the read.  :-)Dear Susan, With all love and respect I will be telling you this. You are portraying Jesus as a God of love. As a matter of fa … [Read more...]

How to be a Real Hero in the Gay Debate


“Anyone can slay a dragon, he told me, but try waking up every morning and loving the world all over again.  That’s what takes a real hero.” - Brian Andreas.Sometimes I can get a little snarky. I have wondered if it's too much. Every day, especially over the past two weeks, we hear way too much negativity, piling on, attacks, condemnation on social media and elsewhere. Non-affirming Christians and gays Christians, members of one letter in LGBTQ and someone of a different letter in LGBTQ, cons … [Read more...]

A Big Gay Wedding – Actually, 40 of Them!


What do you call more than 40 same-sex couples marrying en masse on the lawn of Austin’s capitol? A “Big Gay Wedding,” of course! And what a gay event it was. The sun was shining and these brightly arrayed couples—many of whom were dressed in matching outfits—showed up smiling and ready to go. After all, some of them had been waiting for years, even decades, until they could tie the knot legally in their home state.Rob and I simply would not have missed it!I write this for you for two rea … [Read more...]

40 Real Answers to your 40 Questions. To Kevin DeYoung & The Gospel Coalition


“If I get the choice between Pie Heaven and Regular Heaven, I will choose Pie Heaven. It may be a trick, but if not, mmmm, pie!!” – Deep Thoughts with Jack Handy, SNLMany people saw a post that appeared on The Gospel Coalition asking us 40 questions about LGBTQ and gay marriage. One of those people was a family member who sent it to me asking me to answer.I imagine a lot of you have had questions like this posed to you  - so I thought it would be a great idea to share my answers here. I … [Read more...]