The Inclusive Explanation of Marriage

The Inclusive Explanation of Marriage December 1, 2015

FREEDHEARTS marriage explanation

I saw this “Best Explanation of Marriage” meme being shared around social media by Christians who are anti-LGBTQ and, well… I just couldn’t help myself! I hope you like my corrections.

I’m worn out hearing that God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve, followed by a mic drop. Sigh. God created an entire humanity of Adams and Eves, and some 10% of them turned out to be LGBTQ. At this point, many are saying, “Get over it!”

I’m exhausted hearing about the “complementarianism” of women — an extra-biblical idea pushed forward by male pastors who would like to keep women in a different but “complementary” place from men. (Cough, cough, “Wayne Grudem.”) Women held all kinds of leadership roles in the New Testament, as James Brownson’s lays out clearly in his book Bible, Gender and Sexuality (p. 60-64).

Quite frankly, this idea of “separate but equal” should make us all nervous. We’ve heard it before, if you recall, and it turned out to be long on separate but short on equal.

The important part here is that two people become one flesh. That’s where the power is, there’s where the life is. Our very DNA calls out for community, and for intimate companionship—someone to cook pancakes for in the morning, someone to go watch that great new movie with, someone to ruin your lace shirt by putting it in a hot dryer.

Someone to share kids with. Someone to get mad at, someone to make up with, someone to grow old with and wonder how you ever did it. And someone to gaze at through moist eyes, because you don’t know how you’ll survive if they die first, and sometimes you hope you go first so you’re not left behind, but other times you hope they go first because they don’t want to be left behind either.

If you believe this arc of life is possible only in a relationship between a man and a woman, and no other gender configuration, then you do not personally know people in relationships of other gender configurations – and if you do, you went to them with your mind already made up.

Even a child can recognize and be perfectly fine with Aunt Michele and Aunt Tina – or Daddy Tim and Papa Bill – or their trans sister. It’s only those who already had their heart set against it who stumble all over these people.

Please. Stop placing your Bible on the table, cracking its spine, and dissecting it. We do that with dead things.

If your Bible is no longer living, it no longer offers life. Seek the Living Spirit that animates the Bible and brings hope. Let your heart be filled with hope.

And remember…

Marriage is not about religion. Atheists get married.
Marriage is not about reproduction. The infertile get married.
Marriage is about love. That’s it.
And that’s beautiful.

(Please be sure to click here or on the photo above to see the changes I made.)


We have extensive resources helping those in the faith community reconcile this issue and be more fully inclusive; helping parents love, accept & affirm their LGBTQI children; and helping LGBTQI heal shame from family, church & community wounds. We also have private Facebook support groups for parents, and chosen family for LGBTQI. Please come say hello. Click here.

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