Bathroom product loyalty beats denominational loyalty

Over at the “Calvinist cool” post, opinions are still raging. They have moved to the issue of whether being Lutheran or Reformed or whatever should even matter. As I reflected on that, I came across this report:

Protestant churchgoers are no more loyal to their denomination than they are to brands of toothpaste or bathroom tissue, reports one research firm.

Results from the latest Ellison Research survey, released Monday, show that 16 percent of Protestants are exclusively loyal to their denomination and will only consider attending a church within their current denomination if they were placed in a situation where they had to leave their current church.

The rest are open to considering other denominations. Fifty-one percent said they prefer one denomination but are open to others and 33 percent said they do not have any preference for one specific denomination.

Ellison Research found similar levels of loyalty among churchgoers to other products and services. Twenty-two percent said they are exclusively loyal to one brand of toothpaste and 64 percent expressed a brand preference (while also considering other brands); 19 percent will only consider one brand of bathroom tissue and 59 percent said they prefer one brand but are open to others; and 16 percent said they are loyal to one brand of pain relievers with 57 percent expressing preference for one brand but also considering other kinds.

I’ve been trying to formulate a joke here–it’s on the tip of my tongue–but I think I’ll just pass on the opportunity.

It seems to me that many, if not most, denominations do not have that much doctrinal distinctiveness any more, so that the denomination has indeed become just another brand, with one being not all that different from another. Joining a new congregation involves just a handshake with the minister, rather than months and months of catechesis.

Denominations that DO have a particular theological commitment are being pressured to give it up, but that will only put them too in the consumer marketplace, making them just one more generic brand. Like another brand of toilet paper in the white canyon of Walmart’s toilet paper aisle.