What are these bonds that evade us? Where is the woman that will remain standing with me when the storm blows over and shakes us to our roots? Are these the dreams of a middle school girl who can’t come to grips with the reality of womanhood? Am I pining for a time past and can never be recaptured? Can true bonds only be forged among the innocent of hearts? Am I too judgmental, bossy, intrusive, brash, needy and attention... Read more
Growmama Picks is a collection of fun, interesting, and/or inspiring links that we’ll share with you at the end of every month. 1. This article on resilience in children was posted on our discussion board. 2. Last week’s NPR story, as well as the French face-cover ban, sparked some interesting debate. Dr. Imad Bayoun’s Friday khutba response was timely. 3. Collard Green Muslim had us laughing and crying at her story The Day My Soul Caught Fire. 4. We were deeply touched by Yasmin Mogahed’s Why... Read more
For Muslim women who are wearing hijab, hoping to put it on, thinking of taking it off or already have, watching the media put their spin on hijab is surreal. Class, politics, oppression, suppression, economic status, religious superiority, intellectual inferiority, modesty, shame, pride—it’s all been said. The more layers are piled on, the more complicated hijab seems. So, why do you wear that scarf? I’ve been asked that question a hundred times, but sometimes still fumble for an answer. The... Read more
They were little: crawling, babbling, teething, walking, sleeping, waking. First it was preschool, then elementary, off to middle school and finally into high school. Plays, concerts, classroom parties, volunteering, cub scouts, girl scouts, softball, karate, gymnastics, practice, soccer, swimming, art projects, science projects, religion, mock trials, honors classes, MUN, AP, IB, MSA, GPA, SAT’s, college applications and 18 years later …University. It’s here, the time when they go. For some, our children left us a long time ago, for others its now and for the rest, it... Read more
I have a vision of how I want to earn the pleasure of Allah (swt). This vision is filled with intensive learning, spiritual halaqas, and being in the company of those who fill me with His remembrance. I yearn for a deeper understanding of the Qur’an, learning the etymology of the rich Arabic words that are pregnant with meaning. I dream of going abroad, praying fajr in different masaajid, sitting at the feet of learned scholars, going from one spiritual... Read more
This week, we asked three of our GrowMamas this question: What do you recommend in terms of habits or rituals that allow you as a busy mother to relax and nurture yourself from time to time? Z writes: “Motherhood is not only the most rewarding job in the world; it is also the most demanding. If we don’t nurture ourselves, it’s easy to feel ‘depleted’ and lose our positive energy, often feeling like we don’t have much to give to others. Every day I try... Read more
It feels like drowning in the dark, and you don’t know how to swim. Sometimes it feels like the sick feeling you have when you get the news that someone very close to you has a deadly disease. I can go on and on how horrible it feels but it won’t be enough. That’s what depression feels like. In the beginning nothing worked, I didn’t know what was “happening” to me so my kind family doctor gave me anti-depressants. I... Read more
Being pregnant was a surreal experience for me. I had never liked pets. You probably can’t see the connection between pets and pregnancy, but for a person who was never comfortable around little living, breathing creatures with anatomies that differed from mine, a slight stretch of the imagination is all you need to see what I mean. Plus the two were almost totally absent from my childhood. So when I felt the baby kick, and later hiccup, bend her elbows,... Read more
Last night was movie night in our house. We were camped on on the bed, hubby on one side, me on the other, baby in between, my oldest son teetering on the far edge while his brothers and sister came and went. They were more interested in fighting space battles with plastic light sabers than watching a shoot-em-up bang-bang movie on TV. The movie was pure action adventure, with an unlikely hero pitted against a stereotypically evil bad guy. At... Read more
If I interrupt this silent reverence With a hurry up, come, what do you see? I divert her quiet moment with nature, And point it instead at me. At screens, voices, more stimulation, Questions, answers and explanations But what really matters, what makes it real, Is that here she learn to listen and feel. Touching the textures and rhythms of creation This reverence may one day lead to worship One day she may hear the pulsing glorification From rocks under... Read more
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