Let There Be Light!

This is Day 5 of Hindtrospectives’ #MyMosqueMyStory series for Ramadan 2015

By Hanna Miri

There is a masjid I know very well. It’s my local masjid. And while I would not consider myself a regular masjid-goer, (I prefer praying alone at home) there are times I need community and connection. When I do manage to go, I have hope in achieving an “Iman Rush”- which comes from having prayed with no distractions and with concentration.

I remember fondly one Jummah last Ramadan. I was at my Chicago area masjid. The ladies section is on the top floor. Just imagine walking up a steep staircase, greeted by large windows. Imagine these windows encircling the perimeter with skylights above. Imagine this architectural arrangement of windows and skylights letting in sunshine that rains light upon a royal red carpet.

This particular Friday was sunny. When other ladies were looking for shaded spots, I sought out the most sunshine. That was MY spot, the sunshiney-est environment to get that ever elusive Khushoo3. Salah in the sunshine can’t be beat.

Iftar and Maghreb prayer that same day at that same masjid was well lit with light from the electric lights above. I was happy, and more importantly I was awake and ready for Salah.

Summer means a late night Taraweh. I am tired, and sleepy. If ever a there was a time I need bright light it is during Taraweh.

Taraweh starts and OUT GO THE LIGHTS. DARKNESS ensues in the ladies section. I go to turn on the light – an old woman hisses at me. “The men will see us!” She didn’t seem to care about anyone seeing us during Maghreb, nor does she care that I and several other ladies want the lights on. Nor was she willing to compromise.

I test her theory out and text my brother during the break between rakats, when the lights are turned on again. “NOPE sis, can’t see a thing, it’s too high up.” And of course the men’s area is full of light.

Several ladies tell me they would prefer the lights on, but the Darkness Brigade of Aunties is too strong and deep in their love of the dark side.

Lights out again, DARKNESS, I turn on the lights “The men will see us” NO they won’t. I explain my experiment and I get hissed at again. Now I am tired, ANGRY, praying in the dark and falling asleep in Sujood. Goodbye Khushoo3, goodbye Wudu. Goodbye Masjid.

Maybe I’m selfish, or shallow. Maybe my Iman is not where it needs to be. Maybe I should be content praying in the dark like a bat or a cockroach. I guess for some people their Iman is so high; they could pray in the worst possible conditions and be focused on their Salah. I think of my brothers and sisters in dark places like Gaza, Syria, and Iraq. But then again, I’m not in Gaza; I’m in an upper middle class suburb of Chicago, where electricity is plentiful and abundant. I shouldn’t have to pray in the dark.

I’m on a quest for a new masjid to pray Taraweh in Ramadan. A masjid where the ladies are enlightened and pray in light.

I pray Allah gives me patience this Ramadan, I pray that Allah guides me as described in Surah Nur vs 35, and that if I am wrong and should be content praying in the dark that he help me stay awake and focused or helps me find a new masjid that meets my needs, and I pray I make it to Jannah one day, and that I will always have light. Inshallah.

Allah is the Light of the heavens and the earth.
The parable of His Light is a niche wherein is a lamp—
the lamp is in a glass, the glass as it were a glittering star—
lit from a blessed olive tree,
neither eastern nor western,
whose oil almost lights up,
though fire should not touch it.
Light upon light.
Allah guides to His Light whomever He wishes.
Allah draws parables for mankind,
and Allah has knowledge of all things.

An Nur verse 35

Hanna Miri is a Chicago-born Palestinian American. She is a Corporate Trainer by trade and has been in the Learning and Development industry for 15 years. She is a lifelong seeker of Islamic Knowledge, Allah’s mercy, and yes – light. Follow Hanna on Twitter!