inviting family into solace and solitude

My family has now become part of, or has entered, one of my deep places of solitude.

From time to time, I share something quite personal. This is from an actual journal entry.

I have always said my heart expanded when I got married. It did so as well with each child God gave us. I thought new thoughts, established new strengths and new depths of love… just like that.

I was actually looking for an exact date in October, but perhaps I’ll review other journals. For the moment, this is about as close as I’ll get.

Looking back, I am struck by the descriptive language in this piece. Perhaps I was just caught up in love with my family, trying to express it poetically, as I wrote. Shouldn’t we all be at times?

Tuesday, October 23, 2007, 8:32 am

Both the boys are in bed, Crystal is out shopping with Rhonda, and I’m thinking about yesterday.

Yesterday we loaded up the boys and headed for the ocean. Susie had recommended the beaches at Lover’s Point so we went there.

It was perfect, a little cool, but warm down on the beach. The water was freezing. It was great weather for wading, exploring tide pools, and making sand castles.

We played all morning until early afternoon. Crystal took pictures and I shot video. Then we set off in search of lunch and found Carrows.

Carrows wasn’t that great, but the rest of the day was. May I say that it was just a good day to be a man… to be a dad? It was wonderful to be surrounded by my family, enjoying the day at the ocean.

At Carrows, Crystal took both boys to the restroom. I sat at the corner booth, with a view of the bay.

As I sat alone, my mind went back to 1992-93 when I lived in Santa Rosa. I would drive over to Bodega Bay by myself, explore the rocks and cliffs, and eat at local restaurants.

What a different time that was.

Yet as I sat alone in Carrows, it came back over me like a flood.

Then my family came back to the table. What a difference.

My family has now become part of, or has entered, one of my deep places of solitude.

It was in my trips to the ocean that I often found solace and renewal.

This family trip plus Carrows, which reminded me of Coco’s, drew these memories out.

Sure, Carrows wasn’t the Sandpiper Restaurant on the Sonoma Coast where I could get lost in a crowd, enjoy a good meal, or just a good cup of coffee.

However, what am I to do with yesterday and the wealth of memories that are unearthed from deep inside?

Where once there was just me, there exists another three.

It feels like a line has just been drawn connecting two parts of me.

Rev. Jared Ingle

LinkedIn CLICK HERE

featured image: Bruce Bortin | The fabulous Sandpiper Restaurant | Bodega Bay, CA | 08.02.06

inset picture: Baysider.com | Sandpiper Seafood Restaurant | Bodega Bay, Sonoma County, California | 11.23.17