Jesus: Peter’s Beautiful Addiction

Of all the disciples, I think I love Peter the most, for all of his silly buffoonery, bluster, and the fact that I can relate to all of it.

Peter, the man who is desperate to always be Jesus’ favorite, who puts clothes on to jump into the water, whose passion and desire to be good and pleasing to both God and people often leads him to sin. Out of all the disciples, Peter probably was the least emotionally mature when Jesus found him and the one with the most over-achievement-itis. He was probably the least equipped to become a leader of the people, to do this work of building a church.

And yet look at Peter go.

I woke up this morning thinking about Peter, about how he put his clothes on before he jumped out of the boat, about how he couldn’t wait to get to run to Jesus when he saw Him on the beach. He couldn’t wait for the boat to dock, the ropes to be tied. He saw his Lord, and he wanted to run to him. So he jumped ship. He threw himself into the water to get to Jesus faster. But he put his clothes on first.

Scholars say it’s because in Jewish custom a greeting was considered a religious act and therefore, one needed to be clothed. But I always picture this moment as a perfect example of Peter’s impulsiveness and absolute passionate love for Jesus. I picture him so beside himself with desire to be near God that he simply forgets himself, is not thinking straight, and so gets dressed to jump into the water to get to Jesus, and to his destiny.

I think a lot about destiny in my life and in my career, and I think when my alarm went off this morning, it was destiny that made me think of Peter, jumping into the water fully clothed, because destiny chasing is sort of like that, when you do it right, and when you do it with Jesus.

Because Jesus evokes a passion that’s a little overwhelming, a little bit manic, like an addiction. Jesus messes you up, makes your heart do all these crazy things like love the kinds of people you’re supposed to hate, like feeling more at home in crumbling homeless shelters than in poshy New York City apartments, like seeking reconciliation — instead of retribution — with people who don’t deserve it.

Jesus makes you love and release and respect and not fear. He calls you out onto the waters of risk-filled relationship, where people don’t understand how you can forgive that person, how you can choose mercy and not revenge, and how all this can start shaping a destiny for your life that you never would have chosen for yourself when you were perusing the shelves at Destiny Mart.

And when Jesus calls you to your destiny, when he’s standing on the beach telling you to let down your nets — go on, cast them wide! Something happens in your heart cells that leaves you changed forever. You want to do what he says, even though you know it’s probably the most stupid thing you’ve ever heard.

And suddenly you are overwhelmed with the abundance of living your destiny — and I do mean overwhelmed. Suddenly opportunity starts banging down your door, insistent. It starts popping in at all hours for tea. It starts following you around like a hungry kitten. And maybe you start feeling a little like, holy shit, I don’t think I’m going to know what to do with all this. You think maybe I’m not good enough.

You start writing that book you always wanted to write, and suddenly a literary agent is sitting next to you at your martial arts class. I’m not good enough.

You put a new website up and within 24 hours you start getting speaking gigs. Can I really do this?

Your tiny little blog gets put on Patheos. Holy crap! Wait — what? Am I really ready for this?

But when you realize it’s Jesus who’s calling you from the beach, and all of a sudden, all you can see is him. So you put your clothes on and jump in the water, into your destiny, and start swim-running toward your beautiful addiction. Because that’s all you need to keep you going — just a hit of Jesus.

After a long night of fruitless fishing, of no results for the overachieving soul that was Peter, the nets hauled in 153 big fish, and still the nets did not break.

Because when God’s in charge of the destiny, the destiny might get your clothes wet. You might have to sit in soggy underwear while you eat your breakfast. And you might look a little foolish, what with jumping in the water with your clothes on.

And though you may feel a little overwhelmed, your nets will not be broken by God’s abundance.

Your nets will not break, and there will be a warm fire to dry your clothes and breakfast to fill your belly. And Jesus will take each of your shortcomings and redeem them, one by one, for his glory, giving you the beautiful chance, each and every time, to insist on how much you love him.

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If you’re interested in finding your destiny, I’m teaching a class in September.