Can you believe that yesterday I overheard another conversation about Christianity? Amazing! This one was between “Ann” and “Betty.” And it’s made me wonder: Are other Christians these days feeling as Ann does? Do any of you guys? Ann: I feel weird telling you this, but I haven’t been to church in seven months. Betty [gasps]: You’re kidding. But you’ve been going to your church since forever. You practically run that church. Ann: I know. At first I was just... Read more
Sitting at Starbucks yesterday I overheard the following exchange between two men I’ll call Bob and Dan. I recount it here not to make any point of my own, but because it perfectly captures the kind of logjam we Christians so often reach when trying to explain our beliefs to non-Christians. Dan: But that just doesn’t make any sense. Bob: What doesn’t? Dan: That the same God who loves me might very well condemn me to hell for all eternity.... Read more
When speaking about matters of faith, we Christians use (duh: what else?) the only language available to us. But using language to capture the reality of God is like trying to use numbered children’s blocks to teach quantum physics. It’s simply insufficient for the job. By default, then, the language we employ to describe our relationship with Christ is precisely the same language we use to talk about our actual, human relationships. We say that we “walk” with Jesus, “talk”... Read more
From the bottom of my heart I want to thank those of you who, in response to Question of the Week: Does My Wife Have Cancer?, Waving Into the Dark, and God and I Discuss My Wife Having Cancer, wrote to send my wife Cat and me your prayers, love and personal stories sharing your own experiences with this sort of difficulty. Greta, Jessica, Laurie, Bitsy, Christy, Mike B., Rachel, Melissa, Anita C-H, Jake-ann, Latoya, Becky, Lynn, Andrew, Rebekah, Mario,... Read more
(After Question of the Week: Does My Wife Have Cancer?) Me: You know I have to sort of hate you now. God: I know. Me: It’s nothing personal. God: I know. Me: It’s the impersonality of death and suffering that makes it so blindingly infuriating. God: I know. Me: Makes it hard to believe you give a [bad word] about us. God: I know. Me: But I understand the necessity of death. I wrote Death is the Answer. I get... Read more
It’s 11 a.m. and I’m in a doctor’s office, listening on my iPod to M.I.A.’s “Paper Planes” (which just shuffled to Talking Head’s “Once in a Lifetime”—but never mind). My wife Cat is back where the Medical Stuff happens, getting a biopsy. They’ll snip a piece out of her, examine it, think about it. Cancer, maybe! What the fuck is that about? (Sorry, sensitive-types: I sometimes curse. I’m confident that, of all things, God takes seriously context.) Yesterday was the... Read more
I was pretty sure I was done with blogging, but now find myself compelled to share with the friends I’ve made here the awful news that it seems quite likely that my wife Cat has cancer. BUT IT HASN’T BEEN CONFIRMED, so it’s not like I’m secretly shopping for a tombstone or anything. Last week and this we’re going through all the tests and consultations to confirm her condition and decide what to do about it. Seems pretty clear that,... Read more
[This is part two of day-before-yesterday’s My Life as a Major Criminal.] “Almost time,” Ben whispered to me at 2:50 p.m. Ben was literally my partner in crime. If I was Clyde, Ben was Bonny, except he would look terrible in a dress. But to pull off a caper Ben would put on a dress if that’s what was called for. He was the first person with whom I’d shared my plan; his help putting it together—and the help he... Read more
It was a plan of monumental audacity. Its success would bring to its knees the all-powerful institution that existed for no reason but to systematically crush our spirits. Its failure would leave me so screwed I’d have to change my name to Flathead Phillips. It was absurd to think a crime so vast and intricate could succeed. In order to pull it off twenty-four people, twenty-one of whom had never been involved in any but the most trifling criminal activity,... Read more
I think about death a lot. I figure anyone alive does, but I could be wrong about. I think I’m more impatient than most people. I’m always abnormally interested in how things are going to end. Anyway, death is terrible. It’s an unthinkable affront to everything that’s dear to us. Everyone knows that. So it makes me wonder: Why do we have to do it? And why is it so final? And how come people who die are sooooooo totally gone from... Read more
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