As a conservative Catholic writer, I often take a beating from readers who think my advice leads people to unhealthy behaviors. I regularly encourage people to accept their crosses with humility, to not date after divorce unless they have been through the annulment process and have a decree of nullity in hand, and definitely to save sex for marriage. Some readers react quite negatively and accuse me of training people to be co-dependent doormats. For example, I addressed the issue... Read more
The holidays are tough for a lot of people, especially those who are divorced and if you’re anything like me, you’re ready for a change when the new year rolls around. Maybe you have a set list of resolutions to work on, maybe not. But regardless, if you want 2016 to be a better year, you need to have some sort of plan. So here are a few suggestions that can help you move forward in your healing process –... Read more
One of the most difficult periods in life you can experience is trying to rebuild your life after having gone through a divorce. Imagine the cartoon character Wylie Coyote falling off a desert cliff, plummeting down thousands of feet, landing flat on his back and creating a huge crater in the ground. It should have killed him, but it didn’t. Surviving divorce feels much the same; the pain should have killed you, but it didn’t. And now, you’ve got... Read more
“If you died today, do you think you would go to heaven?” 30 years ago, my then teenage sister was hurrying down an empty street, making her way to the bus stop. As she scurried down the walk focused on the bus in the distance that was beginning to slow, she heard a voice beside her ask, “If you died today, do you think you would to to heaven?” Startled, she looked up to notice a young man leaning against... Read more
I was doing a little Facebook surfing last night and came across a picture that stunned me. A friend of mine, Judy, whom I haven’t seen in about 5 years was in this picture but it took me a minute or two to recognize her because her beautiful hair is all gone. She is completely bald. She is battling cancer. The photo reveals the physical effects of this terrible disease she’s suffering through, but what was amazing to me about... Read more
Advent is a time for us to “prepare the way of the Lord” and the goal of this season is to slow down and spend some time reflecting upon the meaning of Christmas. But what if your personal life is such a mess or is so painful that you just find it too difficult pay any attention? How do you prepare your own heart when you struggle with that terrible emptiness divorce brings and it just hurts too much to... Read more
Back in 2008, I met a divorced woman named Jodi whose “first Christmas after divorce” story was one of the most inspirational ones I’d heard. Whether you’re recently divorced or have been for a while, I’m sure you’ll appreciate it and maybe it could change the way you approach the upcoming holidays. Jodi’s husband divorced her after 13 years of marriage. A custody agreement for their four children, ages 5 – 12, dictated they would spend Christmas with their dad... Read more
I got married at the age of 26. By that time, I was able to check a lot of things off that people say one should do before getting married, like going to college, traveling, and having great experiences. My husband was raised Catholic and we had the same faith in common, and that was like having another “marriage insurance” item checked off. We went to a few pre-marital counseling sessions with our parish pastor and took the compatibility test.... Read more
In addition to being the Feast of the Immaculate Conception, today marks the start of the Extraordinary Jubilee of Mercy. I personally have anticipated this great event because, in helping others heal from divorce, mercy is a key component of what I do. Thanks to Pope Francis, now there is even more reason to promote this theme in our troubled society and witness the many graces and blessings that will take place. I’d like to begin by asking you two... Read more
At some point in my single years, a very handsome co-worker asked me out on a dinner date. But, instead of taking me out to a restaurant that evening, he surprised me by preparing a gourmet meal for us at his house. The food was amazing and we had a lot of great conversation. But then without warning, he began making strong advances. Before I knew what hit me, he was leading me toward the bedroom. I had been doing... Read more
Lisa Duffy: A Million Unheard Souls
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