461 Followers!

Today, my minions, I have something different in mind. We Dark Lords enjoy it when ignorant armies clash by night, destroying one another in ironic zealotry over tribal religious beliefs that have completely forgotten the teachings of their founders. I find histories of the 17th Century Wars of Religion, for instance, to be enjoyable bed time reading. All those slaughters in the name of the Prince of Peace! Delightful! And the KKK, burning the symbol of redemption as a prelude to lynchings of non-Protestants with the wrong color skin or a funny name. Perfection! Not to mention all the brilliant evangelization for the One True Faith as the Crusaders slaughtered Rhenish Jews on the way to the Holy Land. Wonderful! We Dark Lords just love it when Christians start acting like Orcs and congratulating themselves for their piety while they do it.

So: what better way to commemorate Friday than for Catholics who really really love to ignore Jesus’ commands about loving their neighbor (and don’t even get me started on loving your enemies) to go ahead and use the combox below to tell me all about how all Muslims are all exactly the same, how we should round them up and expel them from the US for the crime of being Muslim, how the very bestest way to show our truly true Christian spirit is to burn their Qurans and declare them all indistinguishable from bin Laden, and to assert the spirit of true Christian charity with rallies, book burnings and calls for mass deportations?

If you feel the need to express this wonderfully orkish spirit, please do so in my comboxes below. Heck! Post the whole manifesto of the book burner in Florida and tell me how it all is in the spirit of the one who ate with tax collectors and told the parable of the Good Samaritan. What could *be* more in keeping with Jesus’ teaching than mindless xenophobic loathing of a billion people that consigns them to the status of the Alien Evil Other and uses their most revered object as a punching bag? Go for it! Make your case!

And none of this wussy “But they are human beings in the image and likeness of God” crap. Pay no attention to those lying Muslim bastards who write things like this:

A Muslim Mourns Father Ragheed Aziz Ganni

In the name of the compassionate and merciful God,

Ragheed, my brother,

I ask your forgiveness for not being with you when those criminals opened fire against you and your brothers. The bullets that have gone through your pure and innocent body have also gone through my heart and soul.

You were one of the first people I met when I arrived to Rome. We met in the halls of the Angelicum and we would drink our cappuccino in the university’s cafeteria. You impressed me with your innocence, joy, your pure and tender smile that never left you.

I always picture you smiling, joyful and full of zest for life. Ragheed is to me innocence personified; a wise innocence that carries in its heart the sorrows of his unhappy people. I remember the time, in the university’s dining room, when Iraq was under embargo and you told me that the price of a single cappuccino would have satisfied the needs of an Iraqi family for a whole day.

You told me this as if you were feeling guilty for being far away from your persecuted people and unable to share in their sufferings …

In fact, you returned to Iraq, not only to share the suffering and destiny of your people but also to join your blood to the blood of thousands of Iraqis killed each day. I will never forget the day of your ordination [Oct. 13, 2001] in the [Pontifical] Urbanian University … with tears in your eyes, you told me: “Today, I have died to self” … a hard thing to say.

I didn’t understand it right away, or maybe I didn’t take it as seriously as I should have. … But today, through your martyrdom, I have understood that phrase. … You have died in your soul and body to be raised up in your beloved, in your teacher, and so that Christ would be raised up in you, despite the sufferings, sorrows, despite the chaos and madness.

In the name of what god of death have they killed you? In the name of which paganism have they crucified you? Did they truly know what they were doing?

O God, we don’t ask you for revenge or retaliation. We ask you for victory, a victory of justice over falsehood, life over death, innocence over treachery, blood over the sword. … Your blood will not have been shed in vain, dear Ragheed, because with it you have blessed the soil of your country. And from heaven, your tender smile will continue to light the darkness of our nights and announce to us a better tomorrow.

I ask your forgiveness, brother, for when the living get together they think they have all the time in the world to talk, visit, and share feelings and thoughts. You had invited me to Iraq … I dreamed of that visit, of visiting your house, your parents, your office. … It never occurred to me that it would be your tomb that one day I would visit or that it would be verses from my Quran that I would recite for the repose of your soul …

One day, before your first trip to Iraq after a prolonged absence, I went with you to buy souvenirs and presents for your family. You spoke with me of your future work: “I would like to preside over the people on the base of charity before justice” — you said.

It was difficult for me to imagine you a “canonical judge” … And today your blood and your martyrdom have spoken for you, a verdict of fidelity and patience, of hope against all suffering, of survival, in spite of death, in spite of everything.

Brother, your blood hasn’t been shed in vain, and your church’s altar wasn’t a masquerade. … You assumed your role with deep seriousness until the end, with a smile that would never be extinguished … ever.

Your loving brother,

Adnam Mokrani
Rome, June 4, 2007
Professor of Islamic Studies in the Institute for the Study of Religion and Culture,
Pontifical Gregorian University

Truly true Americans and truly true Orkish Christianity bids you to ignore all this “compassionate decent Muslim who is very much like a human being” agitprop and instead always and only focus on evil and never acknowledge anything good about any Muslim. As one of my readers brilliantly points out:

America has no business letting our enemies – and Muslims are our enemy – move into America.

Indeed, really manly Catholic men should have only one question after reading (or better yet, skimming) this letter from Mokrani. Namely, what the hell is a filthy Muslim enemy (because they are all enemies) doing teaching at the Gregorian?! Purge the Vatican of the weak sister “Catholic” fellow travelers who let fiends like him sully the sacred soil of the martyrs! Jesus demands a church purified of all this “charity” garbage. Expel the infidel from Christian lands and send him back to where he came from. Let him take the filthy ecumaniacs in Rome with him!

So have at it. Tell me you favor gratuitously insulting a billion people as part of our Great War for Christian Glory and that everybody from the Pope to Sarah Palin is a pansy ass if they don’t. Post defenses of the yahoo in Florida or his like minded yahoos in Ox Gut, Wyoming or wherever it is yahoos are burning Qurans tomorrow. Tell me all about how Benedict is a fool for engaging in dialogue with imams instead of just hermetically sealing the Church off from all contact with these animals.

Then, when you are done, I will demonstrate my puckish and ironic sense of capricious humor by consigning your IP to my Pit of Despair as for instance, I have already done with my reader above.

The way I see it, this blog only has room for one demented demagogue who spits on total strangers and wants to shovel millions of people around like concrete. I don’t like competition.