Reader Robert Stove is in fine fettle

And sends his reworking of a classic along:

TO TRUMP’S “CATHOLIC” FANBOYS

(with apologies to Sir Arthur Sullivan’s Onward, Christian Soldiers)
By R. J. STOVE

Onward, chic apostates!
Vote for endless war
With The Donald’s hairpiece
Marching on before,
Backed by every playboy,
Every Murdoch stooge!
We don’t know his policies,
But we know they’re “yuge”!

REFRAIN: Onward, chic apostates!
Vote for endless war
With The Donald’s hairpiece
Marching on before!

See the Chief Draft-Dodger
Smash Islamic State!
See the sweatshop owner
Make job prospects great!
Hear Hugh Hefner’s avatar
Call himself “pro-life”!
Watch him date his daughter
Once he’s humped your wife!

REFRAIN: Onward, chic apostates!
Vote for endless war
With The Donald’s hairpiece
Marching on before!

Overrated losers,
Quit your jealous gripes!
Christ is superseded
By the Stars and Stripes!
Vlad Putin will never
Leave us in the lurch!
Time we grabbed more p*ssy!
Porn’s our One True Church!

REFRAIN: Onward, chic apostates!
Vote for endless war
With The Donald’s hairpiece
Marching on before!

Blessed Virgin Coulter,
Pray to Trump for me!
Now thy coronation
Crowns my rosary!
Trump will whump the towel-heads,
Trump will build the Wall!
If we’ve any wetbacks left,
We’ll abort them all!

REFRAIN: Onward chic apostates,
Vote for endless war!
With the Donald’s hairpiece
Marching on before!

Outside the US, lots of conservative Catholics have not lost their minds and are looking at us and wondering how we lost ours.