My brother sends this along

The guy cracks me up:

Gentlemen, I thought you might appreciate this. One of my many duties is to order software for my state agency. Now many of the larger companies (Microsoft, Adobe, etc.) have volume licensing sites. These sites allow authorized agents (like me) to order software in bulk and download the software and serial numbers to distribute the software.

Recently Adobe changed its web site and I found it impossible to find my orders, serial numbers, and software. I finally called their volume license support site (in India, of course) and asked them to show me how to find my software. I had in my hand an Adobe license certificate from my latest order for 3 copies of Adobe Design Premium and Adobe Web Premium software.

After spending two days on the phone with the Adobe folks attempting to get serial numbers and download software off their web site I finally was told I had to submit a proof of purchase despite having read them every number on the certificate over the phone. Although the request came as an email, Adobe cannot accept emails. I was told I must submit a PDF of the license certificate as an attachment via their web site. When attempting to submit the proof I had to choose the software language. Seems simple but see the attached Adobe dropdown list.

Notice they have:
Asia Pac English
Canadian English
EU English
European English
International English
Latin American English
Rest of World English
Universal English
Worldwide English
and my personal favorite
Multi NorthAmerican Language

But no US English or American English or just English. Now they list Canadian and Latin American English but somehow overlooked that chunk of real estate between them, especially ironic given that Adobe is an American company. Now I know of no Latin American country that has English as its primary language. Obviously there must be a huge difference between EU English and European English. International English I reasoned must be for creating International Adobe products which I do not want to do. I pondered several hours among Rest of World, Universal, and Worldwide English. I decided Rest of World English must exclude some undefined county which could be the US and eliminated that. That left me with Universal and Worldwide English. I concluded Universal English must be for those speaking English on other planets. Obviously this is intended for a very small market. Primarily Astronauts ordering Adobe products from the Moon. I finally decided Worldwide English was my safest bet and selected that one after briefly considering Multi NorthAmerican Language. I was worried I may get my Adobe product in Navajo.

This leads me to believe that when the Adobe team sat down to create the language list, they were so worried they might offend some US neighbor or English speaking ethnic group that the resulting politically correct, work shopped, team-built, consensus designed list completely overlooked the good old USA.

BTW. Still cannot access serials or download software.

Your Humble Public Servant

Mike Shea