It’s my Awesome Dark Lord Persona that Attracts Them

Just got this completely believable email:

Hello sweetie

My name is Judy, i am 25yrs old, i’m a free minded,open hearted girl, i like to take life as easy as i could, i’m one of the few that still believes in friendship, love, trust and signs, am very much single and ready to mingle. was browsing through your profile, believe me i like what i see and i am attracted to you,it will be my sincere pleasure to be your friend if you don’t mind, i hope you will not take my request for granted,feel free to email me through ( [email protected] ),i will appreciate it if you can send me some pics to my private email address,i look forward to hear from you soon.

The magnetic power of my world-spanning supervillain coolness just naturally draws women who desire to stand behind my large leather chair looking vacuous and beautiful while I stroke my Persian cat. I will add her to my file of women for whom I temporarily have affection until I throw them to my pet alligators on a capricious whim.