Prioritizing God and Church

Every family will have different priorities. Some they’ll have in common with their friends and neighbors. Others will have unique priorities, and that’s OK.

Just because we don’t totally conform with other people doesn’t mean we’re wrong. It just means we’re different.

But there are three priorities I believe are essential, universal, and unchanging: God, family, and church.

I’ve shared this on many occasions in a variety of settings, and sometimes people mention to me that they’re surprised I separate God and church. Many believe that devotion to church is equal to devotion to God.

While there’s an obvious connection between the two, there is also a very important distinction.

Our devotion to God is a personal issue. It has to do with obedience, personal prayer, and giving God the first and best in every aspect of our lives. That said, it is possible to be highly involved with church without really giving God priority.

In fact, it’s very common. In Jesus’ day, he regularly scolded the Pharisees for doing just that. They practiced their religion with zeal but didn’t place God first.

Giving God priority means we seek and serve him on a personal level, moment by moment. We make Him Lord of our relationships, financial decisions, traumas, successes, conversations, and thought lives.

That’s a lot broader than a commitment to church, right?

Don’t get me wrong, though. Church is extremely important. It has made a dramatic impact on my life, marriage, and family. When Karen and I had problems early in our marriage, it was our church friends—Sunday School teachers and other couples—who invested in our lives, offering us godly counsel and encouraging us with their wisdom.

Our church friends kept us from going the way of many of our other friends who were divorcing and having affairs.

For people who have committed to God and family, the church becomes an essential support network of like-minded people. The church is not only an institution ordained by God to spread the Gospel, but it is also a relational base of accountability, spiritual support, and encouragement.

As I’ve counseled couples through the years, I’ve found that those who don’t succeed are almost always surrounded by negative companions and bad examples. 1 Corinthians 15:33 says, “Do not be deceived: ‘Evil company corrupts good habits.’”

When you build your primary relationships with non-Christians (or non-practicing Christians), you are exposing yourself to enough wrong examples, wrong thinking, and wrong advice to wear down even the strongest believer.

Making church a family priority is the best way to counter this—not just for you and your spouse, but for your children, too.

Take a hard look at the priorities in your marriage and family. Are you giving God first priority? Are you making a point to prioritize church—and the positive, encouraging company of church-going friends—within your family?