5 Things You Will Learn Only After Marriage

I am the queen of marriage preparation. I believe that in order to have a healthy marriage it is so important that you prepare as best as you can. As a pastor and therapist, I counseled countless people on marital issues before I got married but there are certain things that I have a clearer sense of and understanding of now that I am married.

1. Covenant

Covenant is not something that can be taught but it has to be felt, there is something about saying “I do” that seals the deal. You can live with someone for years, but there is something about saying till death do us part that puts a sense of reverence and determination in your heart to make it work(or at least it should).

2. Bond

Scripture says a man will leave his family and cleave or be glued to his wife. The bond that is formed in marriage really is supernatural. Once again, it is something felt, it makes you want to go to the end of the world for the one you love, it makes you know and feel like you will never have to face the world again.

3. Security

Not only is there financial security in a healthy marriage, there is emotional security. Marriage gives you someone to pour your heart to and should be the place where you feel safe to be weak and to be strong; it helps anchor you in who you knew you were always meant to be.

4. Joy

The joy that comes in the hard work, in laying your desires, yourself down, in choosing another person over yourself daily. While at times it is hard there is joy in living for something bigger than yourself.

5. Commitment

Marriage is the most important commitment you will ever make. Commitment matures a person; it teaches us to not to give up, to learn grit. and to have an ability to stick things out.

We thank God for the opportunity to love someone the way He loves the church daily! Do not see marriage as work but as joy, an opportunity to grow like Him.