Mercy Not Sacrifice
At 5:30 pm on Friday, August 9th of this year, I will be at the Wild Goose Festival Performance Cafe sharing 25 minutes of trance music with a combination of spoken and sung vocals. The trance set that I have developed is five songs in continuous mix with an encore of the first song at the end. So the following poetry goes with each of those songs. I footnoted the 37 scripture references so you can see how my mind works. My wonderful new laptop does not have functional audio input capabilities (don’t buy Lenovo!) so I went ahead and ordered a small Behringer mixer to record these vocals over the songs which I will have available in the near future.
I. The light shines in the darkness
The light shines in the darkness,
and the darkness could not seize it;[i]
if the word of truth is a whisper,
will you cup your ears to receive it?
Seaphim saneti, v’torecha ahavti
I hate opinions, but I love your law;[ii]
I hate the diagrams they draw across your art,
their armageddon charts; the need to name
and file everything;
An idol’s all that’s gained when we claim to master truth;
This text is my proof; you cannot close your fist around a beam of light;
The more you clutch your fingers tight, the darker they are on the inside;
‘Cause the letter kills and the spirit gives life;[iii]
If you tighten the vice, the words won’t breathe anything;[iv]
If you only believe what you can own, you’re wearing Sauron’s ring;
‘Cause only darkness tries to seize light;
light may seem like the weakest force in the world,
but nothing can hold it down.
God is light; in him there is no darkness at all.[v] Those who try to own God do not walk in the light, for only idols can be owned. The light can only be touched, never seized. Light is the substance of God’s power. All other forms of power depend on darkness. We cannot truly see each other unless we step into the light. But we remain in darkness to retain our power. Those who want to be their own gods hate the light and stay out of the light, for fear that their deeds will be exposed. But those who live the truth come into the light, so that all may see their good is only done through God.[vi]
You cannot be your own source. Your beauty is a gift from beyond. You are an icon that glows brighter and brighter the more you are emptied of all except for the fullness of the light and breath of the source. Make yourself an instrument of light; let it breathe you into the song that you were made to dance. To obey the light is to be enlightened; to obey the breath is to be inspired.
The wind blows where it chooses and you hear the sound of it, but you do not know where it comes from or where it is going. So it is with everyone who lives in the breath of God.[vii]
The light shines in the darkness,
and the darkness could not seize it;
if the word of truth is a whisper
will you cup your ears to receive it?
God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. Those who try to own God do not walk in the light, for only idols can be owned. The light can only be touched, never seized. Light is the substance of God’s power. All other forms of power depend on darkness. We cannot truly see each other unless we step into the light. But we remain in darkness to retain our power. Those who want to be their own gods hate the light and stay out of the light, for fear that their deeds will be exposed. But those who live the truth come into the light, so that all may see their good is only done through the power of God.
Make yourself an instrument of light; let it breathe you into the song that you were made to dance. To obey the light is to be enlightened; to obey the breath of God is to be inspired.
II. Worship not performance
When I was a child, I knew how to dance;
I knew how to love without calculation;
Life was a garden where I walked with the Lord;
But then my eyes were opened;
I saw that I was naked;[viii]
The mirrors arrived;
and I became their slave.
I watch to see who’s watching me;
That is the name of my disease:
The need to be seen; the need to be sought;
The need to be sold; the need to be bought;
Another future celebrity;
We’re all the same commodity.
Fashioned for envy; fashioned for lust;
The market is the God we trust.
People were bringing little children to him in order that he might touch them; and the disciples spoke sternly to them. But when Jesus saw this he was indignant and said to them, “Let the little children come to me; do not stop them; for it is to such as these that the kingdom of God belongs. Truly I tell you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will never enter it.”[ix]
Is it because children know how to worship?
Is it because they delight without artifice?
Is it because they know without being told that God loves them?
Is it because children have not learned that everyone is performing?
Make me a child again;
Make me a child again;
Make me a child again;
Let me be born again today.
O Lord, my heart has been stilled;
My eyes are not raised too high;
I will not occupy myself with things
too great and marvelous for me.
But I have calmed and quieted my soul,
like a weaned child with its mother;
my soul is like a weaned child with you;[x]
Hochili Elohim; I will put my hope in you.[xi]
Hochili Elohim; I will wait for you to move.
The kingdom of God belongs to the children.
You cannot receive it unless you receive it as a child.
So become a child. Worship. Stop performing.
III. Metanoeite. Pisteueite.
Peplerotai ha kairos kai egniken he basileia tou theou
Metanoeite kai pisteueite en tow euangeliow
The time has been fulfilled; the kingdom of God is at hand;
repent and trust in the good news.[xii]
Metanoeite.
Think beyond your horizons; leave whatever you knew before
Every day.
Pisteueite. To trust is different than to clutch with white knuckled terror.
“Behold, I am making all things new,”[xiii]
Says the ancient whisper that never collects dust,
that refuses to respect our categories,
that will not be told to stop talking.
A master had three servants.
To one he gave ten truths;
To the second he gave five truths;
To the third he gave one truth.
When he returned, the first said,
“Look you gave me ten truths; I have discovered ten more.”
The second said, “I discovered five new truths with the five you gave me.”
The third said, “Master, I know you are a hard man and so I guarded your truth because I was afraid of you and I knew that only then I could be safe. Here; have back what is yours.”[xiv]
Metanoeite.
Think beyond your horizons; leave whatever you knew before
Every day.
Pisteueite. To trust is different than to clutch with white knuckled terror.
The kingdom will not be subdued
By those who make themselves the gargoyles of the truth;
Woe to you who try to shut the gates,[xv]
Who make yourselves the keepers of your master’s plate.
His ways are higher than your ways;
He’s not beholden to your formulas for getting saved;
Like polished graves, you stand your ground;[xvi]
Your goal is not to be astounded anymore;
Your fear has made you hate the true fear of the Lord.
Your fear has made you hate the true fear of the Lord.
IV. The Enemy
The word Satan in Hebrew means the accuser;[xvii]
Those who live their lives in fear of accusation
become accusers themselves;
That is how Satan reproduces;
That is how he takes over the church,
which has always been at war
between those who build walls of
Luciferian self-certainty
And the outsiders God has anointed
to tear the walls down.
For He chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise;
He chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong;
He chose what is base in the world —
the despised ones and those who are not —
to reduce to nothing everything that is
so that none would justify themselves before Him.[xviii]
Tous exouthenemenous en te ekklesia toutous kathizete
Let the despised ones be your judges,[xix]
And then you will know if you are the true church.
If there are two sides, then they are thus:
Diaboloi:
Those who throw their weight around,
knowing whom to use and whom to crush,
who sow seeds of suspicion everywhere
who live in darkness behind their panoptical searchlights,
the grand inquisitors.
Exouthenemena:
Those who tremble under the weight
of what they have seen,
who did not choose to be prophets,
who cannot quiet the zeal that consumes them,
who cannot trust themselves,
who want Jesus to save the world from them.
Hai men epistolai phusin bareiai kai ischurai
he de parousia tou somatos asthenes ha logos exouthenemenos.
His letters are mighty and strong, but in appearance,
his body is weak and his speech of no account.[xx]
He charis mou he gar dunamis mou en astheneia teleioutai.
My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is perfect in your weakness.[xxi]
I do not know which part is flesh and which part is spirit;
I only know that I have been commanded to speak.
Let me know only your cross,
Let me know only your mercy,
I still am lost; I do not want
to make myself your enemy.
Let me know only your cross,
Let me know only your love,
I’m tossed across this sea of wrath,
I need your grace to be enough.
Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven;
Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted;
Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth;
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for justice; they will be filled.
Blessed are the merciful; for they will receive mercy.
Blessed are the pure in heart; for they will see God.
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.
Blessed are those who are persecuted because they spoke up for justice, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are you when people revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you on my account. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for in the same way, they persecuted the prophets before you.[xxii]
Our fight is not against flesh and blood, but against powers and principalities;[xxiii]
The demonic normalcy that moralizes its self-justification
and co-opts the church to bring it under occupation:
We have been invaded
by myths and endless genealogies that promote speculation,[xxiv]
by those who insist on self-abasement and the worship of angels,[xxv]
by the appearance of wisdom in self-imposed austerity,[xxvi]
by enmities, strife, quarrels, anger, and factions,[xxvii]
by those who measure their holiness in the ferocity of their accusations;
these are the diaboloi that have taken us hostage;
these are the Satans that are thrown into the fire
on the day of the Lord when He comes to liberate the captives.[xxviii]
Let me know only your cross,
Let me know only your mercy,
I still am lost; I do not want
to make myself your enemy.
Let me know only your cross,
Let me know only your love,
I’m tossed across this sea of wrath,
I need your grace to be enough for me.
Help me repent of my Luciferian certitude,
of the scorn which I mistake for righteous zeal.
V. Love is the ultimate heresy
Love is the ultimate heresy;
Honor is much safer:
the rules are clear;
fulfill your obligations;
discharge your responsibilities;
pay the appropriate tributes;
salute and return the salutes of others.
In a world built on honor,
people know who’s in charge,
where to stand,
what not to ask for,
how long to wait.
Everyone knows what to expect.
And then the unexpected happens;
Ruach: the voice that will not stop interrupting;
it blows where it wants to;
the tower of truth that we were building to heaven[xxix]
has been knocked down and replaced with holy confusion,[xxx]
no order can withstand the voice of the whirlwind
that loves its wildest creatures:
the lion,
the raven,
the donkey,
the wild ox,
the ostrich,
the horse,
the hawk,
the eagle,
the behemoth,
leviathan.[xxxi]
It is a love that refuses to be domesticated;
It is a love that eschews our highest civilizations;
It is a love that princes only learn when they sleep with the canyon dwellers.[xxxii]
It is the love of those who have no standing —
banei b’li shem — the sons and daughters who have no other name.[xxxiii]
Did you think God spoke only one language?
Did you really think He stopped talking?
Is it really faith if you only believe in a truth that you can diagram?
There was a time when truth was poetry that begat more poetry,
but then the translation stopped.
What is new should not always be scorned,
Nor should what is ancient,
For the ancient truths are also always new
since no one has ever conquered them.
I believe in the voice that remains unconquered,
that rebukes all my self-justifications
and all of yours,
that demands I trust with open hands,
that will not offer me anything except for mercy
and commands that I accept it and become it.[xxxiv]
That is the voice of love.
Take out my heart of stone; replace it with a heart of flesh;[xxxv]
Soften the calloused pride so I can move according to your breath;
Let me be known by how I love and not by what I hate;
Fashion my life into a holy song that you can celebrate.
VI. Word, life, light
At the source is the word; and the word is with God and the word is God. All things are coming to be through this word. What has come to be through the word is life and this life is the light of all people. The light shines in the darkness and the darkness will never seize it.[xxxvi] For even now, the breath of God is poured out over all flesh, so that our sons and daughters prophesy; our young see new visions; and our old still dream.[xxxvii] You cannot stop the word of life from continuing to speak.
The light shines in the darkness,
and the darkness could not seize it;
if the word of truth is a whisper,
will you cup your ears to receive it?
God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. Those who try to own God do not walk in the light, for only idols can be owned. The light can only be touched, never seized. Light is the substance of God’s power. All other forms of power depend on darkness. We cannot truly see each other unless we step into the light. But we remain in darkness to retain our power. Those who want to be their own gods hate the light and stay out of the light, for fear that their deeds will be exposed. But those who live the truth come into the light, so that all may see their good is only done through the power of God.
You cannot be your own source. Your beauty is a gift from beyond. You are an icon that glows brighter and brighter the more you are emptied of all except for the fullness of the light and breath of the source. Make yourself an instrument of light; let it breathe you into the song that you were made to dance. To obey the light is to be enlightened; to obey the breath is to be inspired.
The wind blows where it chooses and you hear the sound of it, but you do not know where it comes from or where it is going. So it is with everyone who lives in the breath of God.
You cannot stop the word of life from continuing to speak.
The light shines in the darkness,
and the darkness could not seize it;
if the word of truth is a whisper,
will you cup your ears to receive it?
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