Resources

Yesterday evening my husband came home to find a frazzled wife. It was too hot for me to keep up with my household chores while he was at work (my body faints easily in this fallen world). I’m a textbook introvert so a week and a half of daily (wonderful) socializing had left me feeling claustrophobic. The children were hot and testy (partially due to my attitude, no doubt). The toilets had both overflowed and clogged. My floor was sticky from juice residue. Diapers had exploded. Nail polish had been spilled ruining clothing and there was a bad smell I couldn’t find the source of. The day just hadn’t gone the way I had anticipated. I felt ill and tired. I was overwhelmed.

I had been praying all day, but it seemed like I was just scraping by and barely fighting off tears. I imagine it was not a nice picture to come home to. But my husband didn’t get frustrated, he didn’t check out and he didn’t try to lecture me on how my attitude needed an adjustment. He lightened my load. He changed diapers. He answered when “Mama!” was hollered. He suggested I go (alone) to the grocery store thereby eliminating the need to  haul 4 children out in triple digit weather today. I gratefully went. I forgot my list  and when I called to ask him to read it to me, he offered to email it to me (smartphones are amazing!). I admit I took my time. The stores were cool and nobody was talking to me. It was like a mini-vacation for my mind and body. I came home 90 minutes later to find the kitchen cleaned, food put away and the children almost in bed.  My husband is a superhero! The evening was starting to cool the house. There wasn’t a trace of stress that had been so prevalent in the previous 10 hours. My strength renewed and my mind refreshed, I was able to focus on getting ready for the next day. I prepared a meal for the slow-cooker. I watered plants. I processed 4 loads of laundry. When I woke up today I was looking forward to my Wednesday.

We should rely on God for our strength. We must call upon Him continually. We are weak and poor and He gives us everything we need. One of the gifts God knew I would need was my husband. Yes, as a wife I am my husband’s helpmeet, but I am especially blessed in that my husband understands that being a good leader means helping his helpmeet. He saw a need and stepped in to fill it. He saw my weakness and took my burden upon himself. He sacrificed himself. This is an aspect of Godly headship. Of course he appreciates it when I help him and I am learning to look for more opportunities to bless him that way, but my husband understands that I am human and he is ok with that.

Wives, don’t think you are a failure if you need help. Don’t feel guilty for asking. God is our ultimate source of help. He is a gracious and realistic God. He didn’t expect the Israelites to make bricks without straw and He doesn’t expect you too either. He knows we get tired. He knows our bodies hurt and our minds overload. He knows we can’t conjure a clean house. Call on Him continually, but don’t forget that He gave us resources that are gifts we should accept thankfully.

This is His body broken for you, eat this and remember Him.  We partake of the sacraments every week at our church. Only in the most extreme situations would we be deprived of that gift. You have to be in a very serious rebellion for that to happen. Yet daily we think nothing of ignoring, criticizing or misusing the other gifts God has given us. He gave us magic to slow our deterioration, He gave us food to minister to our body and soul, He provides shelter over our heads and sunlight in the sky.  He even put funny things all around to make us laugh! He gave us community, He gave us friends and He gave us family. Don’t overlook His gifts and don’t refuse them. Take them and remember Him. I know I am guilty of underestimating how important this is.

Remember we live in a fallen world, and your husband (or friends or church) can’t read your mind. If you need help, ask. Unashamed and thankfully. Don’t abuse the gift, of course, but humble yourself and embrace the kindness our God has shown us and give thanks for the give of resources.