What I was thinking about last night while I brushed my teeth before bed:

• What does it say about me that I cried hysterically through the last fifteen minutes of The Time Traveler’s Wife on one of those movie channels I don’t know why we have but it never has anything good on it anyway? It wasn’t even a particularly great move but its ending was soul ripping. When the time traveler knows when he’s going to die, his wife has the chance to say goodbye and then watches him die. My weep-fest was almost as bad as The Curious Case of Benjamin Button when the love of his life mothers him into his elderly toddler and babyhood. My mama heart could not watch her rocking a dying baby who just happened to be the man she loved. Why did I cry with hiccups during the end of both of these movies? I’ve seen a lot of movie deaths but rarely like these. Is there something to the idea of a woman caring for her man in his death? Do I have an aversion to the idea because of more than the general sadness of death? Chris reminded me that I hate it when he’s sick but I have no problem with his caring for me when I am. Do I have some need to be cared for by my husband but distaste for his being weak? Does this deserve more thought, more commentary about the nature of women or do I just really like my husband?

• I’m really sad for my friend whose boyfriend broke up with her last week. She’s in love with him. He was wonderful. She was ready for a life with him. I hate this for her and I wish there was a way to speed up the grief process for her sake. I wish I had the words she deserves to hear.

• How can I feed my toddler’s budding love for cooking? (The kid said to me yesterday: I help? I love cooking! When I announced it was time to make dinner. He helps with every meal. Even peeling eggs and stirring cereal at breakfast.) The problem is that he throws a massive tantrum every time the food has to cook, especially when it goes in the oven. Is there a secret way to teach patience without having to go through the process of his emotional breakdowns?

That’s it. I was only brushing my teeth for three and a half minutes. I only had time for three thoughts…