How to Find Real Purpose in a World of Illusions
Summary
New generations look for meaning in their lives. It can be very difficult to find, especially if you look in all the wrong places.
How do we find meaning in our dreary lives? It’s a question I’ve wrestled with answering for over 70 years. When I was a teen I wore black pants. One day I went shopping for more pants and the stores no longer carried black. I panicked. I desperately looked in every corner for more. It was my color.
Black is the color of meaninglessness. In ten years, it’s difficult to find things that are truly meaningful. Some of my grandkids wear black.
So what is the secret to finding meaning in our lives?

Ref. verses
Matthew 25:14–30
In the parable of the talents, paraphrased, a land owner gives his property managers money to invest in service while he is gone on vacation. When he comes back, two have doubled the money. He praises them for the job they have done well and gave them a promotion where they would find greater joy.
Alas, the third man buried the money to keep it safe. The land owner sent him away. He had not fulfilled his mission.
What we learn from this is to use and develop the talents and skills we are given so that we experience the joy of using these, and even greater responsibilities, for others.
I truly believe that we are not on this earth to just exist. We are here to learn, love, and experience, or to put it succinctly, to develop. If we don’t develop, we’re not pursing our purpose. And those that stop people from progressing, taking away their opportunities, should have no place to be found.
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Side note: Regarding color, the Luscher Color Test is a remarkable personality test that uses color to help us identify and understand our inner states. Briefly, purple is a spiritual color. Black means emptiness or meaninglessness. Red represents passion about things. Yellow represents excitement. There are other colors. Try it when you’re feeling confused about your feelings toward life. You may discover needs you’re ignoring that need taken care of.
Podcast show links with added content: Substack, YouTube video, Spotify, and Apple podcasts. These appear a day or so after blog-article posts.
And my new song about the cruel trickery of the illusions in life: The Cruel Trickster, Free on Youtube.
End summary
In depth
The spiritual connection to meaning
The life of just existing or getting along is dreary. Family experiences aside, we are reduced to machines that churn out an endless stream of work to maintain our lives, homes, and work product for others.
Religion can tell us we should treat others nicely and look to God, but that doesn’t give our lives meaning.
Meaning is something we have to find on our own. It’s a layer above making do, religion, and treating others nicely.
Ideas that are above the physical include charity (agape love), justice, fairness and equity. When we add these as guiding principles to our lives, we honor God, who is a God of love, and we enrich our lives with things that are worthwhile.
Is there a single meaning to life?
Chasing after “the meaning of life,” is like chasing after gremlins. They hide well. You won’t find one. There is no “single” meaning in life. Each of us have to find our own.
We find and express meaning in different ways. Country singer Johnny Cash wore black, incorporating all of the meaningless things in life that he saw. These resonated deeply with him. He expressed this in his song, Man in Black. It was for all the downtrodden people and the emptiness in them, living in a world where they had no meaning.
My experience
I tried farming, electronics, maintaining cars …. None of them did it for me. Although I have used my background for engineering work in numerous fields, which was a nice diversion from communications, a hobby.
I knew from high school personality inventories that I liked working with people. I was first to volunteer if someone needed help. But that was all I knew about myself. I also lacked confidence with people and was ruggedly independent.
Some think rugged independence is introversion. But on a farm you learn to be that way. You have to count on only yourself to get things done. My Dad would tell me to do things, but he worked shift work so I was on my own most of the time. I had to figure it out.
Today people love heroes. They identify with them, which is wonderful. Some think that’s a problem. But as someone who understands the role of video entertainment in our lives, I think it’s a good thing to identify with. I was flooded with WWII war heroes, but wasn’t so enthused with them. Vietnam was a useless war, but I joined the Navy anyway.
As a young adult, I loved rock music and identified with those on the radio who played those tunes. So, my first job, besides farming, was radio announcer. It didn’t turn into a career, but it gave me confidence, a network of supportive people, and got me started in communications. I did the first rock and roll show on that station. Talking to thousands of people at a time on a regional station was a great gift.
Communications has been a major part of everything I do. It’s not so much a field, but a way of life that gives me meaning. Radio, film making, technical communications, nonfiction and fiction books, spirituality, religion, research into visual semiotics, social psychology – all are ways of entertaining or vital to explaining things to others in a robust way.
I enjoy seeing others develop, or being given the tools to develop. I liked training actors and writers. I love watching The Voice on TV: music and people developing talent. Love it. Wish it had more rock music, but it’s not as popular today, so I don’t watch as much.
My experience with myself and my family is that finding meaning and purpose isn’t about reading books, finding yourself, mindfulness, or taking personality inventories. These things can help, but it’s about staying in tune with your feelings to see what resonates with you.
Finding meaning and purpose is about pushing into new territory and seeing what resonates. People change over time and so do the things that bring meaning and purpose to them. We have to stay tuned to our feelings as we experience and grow.
What are the obstacles to finding meaning?
Experience is crucial
You’re not likely to find many things resonating with you until you get past your basic needs (see Maslow’s Hierarchy) and have the ability to explore life. You have to develop a strong sense of identity, have a network of people that support you, develop skills or talents, and gain confidence.
Sometimes these go hand in hand. First jobs are ways to explore life and find what resonates with you, or doesn’t. One of my daughters took up flying to become a commercial pilot. Great confidence builder, but it didn’t become a career. Now she’s a speech pathologist who also developed the skills to successfully work with behavior problems in school, and develops curriculum for that.
Our other daughter moved to the Netherlands and developed a career in business, and had a lot of independence building experiences. Great confidence builder, so she came back to the US with a lot of valuable skills in international shipping and business.
Our son became one of those few people who migrate software platforms for business. Great confidence builder, but endlessly grinding day and night. He no longer does these, but tackles and solves a lot of difficult problems in other arenas.
Looking in all the wrong places.
In a poem in the conclusion, I talk about looking in all the wrong places. Life is very illusory, leading us down the wrong paths in a cruel trick. We need to stay wary of quests for grandeur, quick roads to the top, setting out to grab fame and fortune as ends in their selves.
The illusions in life are dead ends that leave us with nothing of real value.
Conclusion after this about church planning:
Church planning season – strong impact course
How can churches minister to new generations if they won’t come to church? The church has been losing people at 1% a year, and now most of new generations won’t come.
I developed and presented a course on understanding and working with new generations. I would like to say I had rave reviews, but on a scale of 1 to 5 it averaged 4.5. Well, some people were raving.
The course helps people understand new generations, their values, and their differences. It helps people understand how to build a bridge to them and minister to them. The old worn-out things we used to do don’t work, and for good reason. This solutions focused course enables people to find new ways, appropriate ways, to minister to these generations in their local circumstances. It’s for church groups and generates deep discussion.
Free video preview of the course
Course on Udemy: Understanding and Working with New Generations
Conclusion
I’ll leave you with this poem, or song, The Cruel Trickster, copyright © 2025 by Dorian Scott Cole. Permission is granted to use either in spiritual or religious services with credit attribution.
The Cruel Trickster
I struggled through life,
Weary of the drudgery.
My soul laid waste,
Through poverty and luxury.
Using people for sex,
A cheap thrill of an act,
Left a hole in my heart,
A devil’s cruel pact.
The story to be told,
Of a life wasted on illusion,
Is one of a cruel trickster,
Leaving us in confusion.
Reaching for fortune
Chasing after the gold,
Took all of my time,
My heart filled with mold.
Fame put my picture,
On magazine covers.
But not a friend was in site
Nor a reliable lover.
The story to be told,
Of a life wasted on illusion,
Is one of a cruel trickster,
Leaving us in confusion.
I filled up on games,
A lively pastime,
Til’ I could take no more
Of conquering grime.
The illusions they fooled me,
My days on earth grew few.
Face to face with my follies,
Strung up in a queue.
I learned meaning,
And the purpose it gave,
Came from using my talents,
For others needs to save.
This earthly realm is filled
With physical drives,
But love, justice, and equity,
They surely deprive.
The story to be told,
Of a life wasted on illusion,
Is one of a cruel trickster,
Leaving us in confusion.
Probability Space
What probability spaces can we open in our minds to develop practices that cultivate a deeper connection to the superconscious and enhance our spiritual awareness? How can we effectively integrate spiritual principles into our daily lives to foster personal growth and contribute to a more compassionate and just world?
(A probability space is where all of the elements necessary for something to happen are present and it’s almost inevitable. All it takes is intention.)
Potential Space
If you think creatively and allow your mind to wander and explore, what role does discernment play in evaluating the validity and usefulness of spiritual experiences? How can we reconcile the subjective nature of spiritual insights with the objective demands of scientific inquiry?
(A potential space is a virtual space in our minds where entirely new things can take shape.)More: Is Music A Form Of Prayer?
Would love to hear your thoughts in the comments below. This helps me improve my work.
Please subscribe to my Patheos Newsletter.
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– Dorian
Our answer is God. God’s answer is us. Together we make the world better.
Restore and recreate. Take time to celebrate life. Laugh, sing, and dance regularly, even every day. Happy. This is why we dance to celebrate life: Reindeer actually running and dancing.
Building a Community of Action
New Way Forward community
Can we make positive change in our world and end a lot of suffering?
Helen Keller, who was both blind and deaf, said: “Although the world is full of suffering, it’s also full of the overcoming of it.”
The human spirit yearns for a world without suffering, but it’s through facing challenges that we progress. The world isn’t perfect, but together we can create a future with less hardship. Famine, discrimination, gun violence, and injurious economic and educational disparities are complex problems, yet understanding their root causes empowers us to find solutions.
Launching in first quarter 2025, the New Way Forward community will connect individuals seeking practical solutions and creating lasting change. We’ll focus on understanding problems and their solutions, and how to effectively create change.
Join us in building a brighter tomorrow! New Way Forward on Facebook.
Civic service opportunities
Do Unto Others Kindness Campaign, and civic engagement.
United Methodist Church Volunteer Opportunities.
Join or support Zero Hour and amplify the voices of youth organizing for climate action.
Peoples Hub. Resistance, Resilience, Restoration, Re-imagination. Online Popular Education. For movement workers to learn, connect, collaborate, and strategize – in and across the disability justice and solidarity economy movements.
Stakeholder Capitalism – a video podcast series from the World Economic Forum. Can capitalism be made to work for all of us – and to improve rather than destroy the state of the planet?
General service and aid opportunities (on One Spirit Resources Website). To add your service opportunity to the One Spirit Resources list, contact the author (me) through Facebook Messenger. Note that I only friend people I know.
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Education Opportunities for new generations
Becoming an Entrepreneur – MITx online
Evaluating Social Programs – MITx online
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Bible scripture verses are New American Standard Version (NASB), unless noted.
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Author and books
Appease the Volcano: What does God require from people? The voices of the ancients from many religions echo much of the same things: It starts with law, then mercy and forgiveness, then love. Love is a major emphasis in all major religions and replaces law.
The Prophetic Pattern: Ancient and Modern Prophecy: How to distinguish the intent of various types of prophecies and oracles, both ancient and modern.
Preparing For the Future Of Work and Education: Analysis of the kinds of jobs that AI and Robotics will displace, and the educational requirements for them. AI will replace or augment thirty percent of jobs. This is an in-depth analysis citing many authoritative sources.
Author Website: Dorian Scott Cole