5 Really Awkward Ways to Do Evangelism

Is it okay to admit that sometimes we make witnessing and evangelism really really awkward? If you’ve ever walked up someone’s driveway for Tuesday night visitation while praying, “Dear Lord, please don’t let them be home,” then you know exactly what I’m talking about. Here are five really awkward ways to do evangelism:

1. The Truth Bomber – This is the guy that just doesn’t care. His job is to pull the pin on a truth grenade, throw it in your general direction, without caring about the consequences. This is the random stranger that will randomly come up to you and say, “If you died tonight, do you know where you’ll spend eternity?” To which the proper response is, “Woah, dude. I’m at my kid’s soccer game. Can I just enjoy today? And by the way, why are you talking about me dying today? I don’t know you and you look creepy. Are you a serial killer for Jesus?”

2. The Passive-Aggressive – This one’s a lot more subtle. Not willing to really witness, this guy will just slip in comments without ever actually bringing it up. Here’s an example. If you and your friends are talking about hitting a couple bars on a Friday night, the Passive-Aggressive will say something like, “Go out and have fun if you want, I mean it’s your eternal soul, do with it what you want.” What? Or maybe you’re planning your wedding with a friend, and that friend is passive-aggressive. She’ll say something like, “I mean your wedding day is important. It’s the most important day in your life, I mean, that is, other than the day you die and stand in front of the judgement seat and Jesus decides whether you go to heaven or hell. But by all means, let’s talk some more about color schemes.”

3. The Pick-Up Artist – This one is like a walking time-share salesman. This person has an agenda, and you can tell it from the moment you meet them. You’ll see this a lot in parks and coffee shops, where a person sits down right next to you on the park bench, or chooses the table right next to you. And they say, “Hey. I’m John. Great to meet you. Come here often?” You’re not giving out any vibes that you want to talk. The ear buds are in and everything, but they keep pressing because they have an agenda. “I think getting outside and coming to a park like this is important. What would you say the most important things are to you in your life?” And you’re like, “Just tell me what it is you’re trying to sell.”

4. The Stalker – We’ve all experienced the Stalker. Many times they’ll come in pairs of two, riding bikes, white shirts, black ties, you get the picture. And like a slow moving tidal wave, you see them coming down the street. Knocking on every door. Four doors down, three doors down. You know you’re next, so you’ve got to decide, do I make a quick run to the supermarket? Do I shut off all the lights and hide behind the couch? One of the things you don’t want to do is engage, because if you try and be nice, “I’m really busy today you can try back later,” then they’ll be right back at your house the next day. They’re stalkers.

5. The Two-Wheeler – And then there’s the two-wheeler. This is the person that takes a good, normal, fun-loving conversation and takes such a hard right turn that if your conversation was a vehicle then this person just jacked it onto two wheels. “So did you guys see the game last night? Did you see Lebron and that last shot?” “No, actually I was busy reading Ephesians and writing down my testimony. What’s your testimony?” Easy there buddy, you’re giving everyone whiplash you’re jerking this conversation around so quick.

QUESTION: What other awkward styles of evangelism have you experienced?