Are You Feeling Worthy to Lead?

Some people live their lives to the level of their dreams, while others live life to the level of their wounds. – Dr. David Gruder, Organizational Psychologist

In his daily meditation, Richard Rohr refers to our broken vision of God’s grace. “Psychologically, humans tend to operate out of a worldview of fear and scarcity rather than trust and abundance. This stingy, calculating worldview makes both grace and mercy unimaginable and difficult to experience.”* He goes on to talk about how our vision of God matures over time and we move from the early Biblical image of God as punitive and retributive.

My conversations with my clients and prospective clients, who lead various types of organizations, reveal some negative feelings that they have about themselves. Many even have negative scripts running in their minds telling them things that damage their self-confidence and create self-doubt.

Knowing that all of us have some level of doubt about our abilities, this might not seem unusual; however, at some point these negative scripts block success. There are many ways that messages are transferred from one person to another, most of which we don’t fully understand or even notice. When I work with clients making capital presentations for investors, donors, sponsors, or some other funding source, I notice that they transmit doubt because they doubt there will be positive results. As James Allen stated in “As a Man Thinketh,”* we attract what we are and not what we need.

If we feel unworthy, does that feeling attract negative results? In addition to the unspoken feelings, I get verbal clues that many leaders lack self-confidence and even self-esteem. Do we get this only from our family of origin? Or, do we get this from our church experiences?

I continue to grow my vision of God and take away the image of putting God into my very small box. As I grow my image of God, I can release some of the limitations I have on myself. Releasing the doubt is not necessarily going straight to pride or arrogance. Being humble is not like self-doubt.

I am worthy and I don’t have to have all the right answers. Leading is not about having the right answers; it’s mostly about asking the right questions and then establishing a process for getting the right answers.

I come to a place of knowing that doubting myself is doubting God. God created me and God didn’t create any junk. I’ve arrived at this point mostly from my studies in Bowen Family Systems over the past 6 years. It’s been a transformative journey of self-discovery and personal growth. I recommend the book by Roberta Gilbert, The Eight Concepts of Bowen Theory *

I am worthy to lead and continuing to grow my abilities. How about you?