6. I’ll Fly Away
No, I won’t, and neither will you. Sorry, Kirk Cameron. The rapture is never, ever, ever going to happen, at least not the way dispensationalists claim. I will be gloriously resurrected as heaven meets earth (86 the sloppy, wet kiss part) and the curse of death is broken. But I’m not a bird, and I will not fly away to glory in my birthday suit.