7 Catastrophic Takes

7 Catastrophic Takes October 25, 2019

Self-Portrait by the Afflicted

It’s Friday, so that’s Takes

Little Egglantine (not her real name) (not that little) broke her elbow yesterday. Six kids in and this is our first broken bone. This seems like the perfect time to document all our injuries and some exciting illnesses thus far.

One
One kid finished up a Lyme treatment Wednesday morning, which is her first time on antibiotics. Which brings the count up to three kids on one round of antibiotics each.
Two
One MRI to determine if a kid is lazy or has a brain tumor. Diagnosis—laziness combined with seasonal allergy headaches.
Three
Two kids with stitches, one on the back of the head, one to reconnect an almost completely disconnected nose.
Four
One pediatric root canal three years in the making from an ice skating mishap.
Five
Two split lips that we decided not to stitch up.
Six
One snapped Achilles’ tendon—not of a child but of their father. One totally broken thyroid earned by the mother for long years of service.
Seven
One case of croup, two cases of whooping cough, lots of colds and the flu. Oh, and that devastating swimmer’s ear, where the mother was almost punched in the face by the child for the injustice of needing to have two drops put in the offended ear.

So, anyhow, this is a pretty big catastrophe, especially if she has to have surgery which is apparently a distinct possibility. Probably we’ve had it so easy because I am a more holy person than all the other people who have lots of sickness. Just kidding. I think that we have had a pretty good run because I literally faint at the sight of blood and vomit. In fact, when Matt had his Achilles’ tendon episode, I didn’t even go to hospital with him. I barely managed to show up for my own births. You can all praise God that I wasn’t good enough at math to go into medicine, because if you ever found me standing with an IV in my hand, trying to insert it into another person, that person would probably be about to die and I would be passed out on the floor. So anyway, maybe God is teaching me new things. I’m even going to call the doctor myself today, instead of making Matt do it.

Go read more takes from one who knows about illness and hospitals and whose strength of mind and faith puts me to shame. Or rather, encourages me to keep trying in small, faltering ways.


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