Wordy Wednesday: The Weather

The internet is being pokey and weird, plus it's 7am and all the children are all still sleeping. The dog is gazing at me sadly because I haven't gotten up yet either. Is it already that Fall/Wintery place where we can't get up because of it being cold and dark? Feel like offering up some kind of primeval sacrifice in a desperate way to keep the sun from leaving us all in cold wintry death. Don't worry, I won't actually do it. I'll “pray about it” which is the Christian way of saying complain.

Furthermore, my first summer cold seems to have morphed into some kind of foul second summer cold. Just at the point when I was beginning to cheer up and feel that everything might be ok, my head refilled with cotton wool and I am back to wandering in the circle of muffled confusion. The fact that the tree outside my window is already changing colors contributes immeasurably to my sense of resigned despair.

Someone strange recently tried to impress upon me that because we've just had a terribly long winter followed by a short cold summer we're definitely going to have a brief warmer winter because “God takes care of the animals”. They have to have something to eat, he explained, and God will provide for them. I nodded vaguely and didn't go into it for fear of never getting out again. But I secretly wanted to say, “oh yeah” and “since when”. God does feed the animals. But he also allows drought and bitter cold and tsunami and destruction and earthquake and fire. What about, I wanted to say, that long cold period of a thousand years where Europe was covered in ice? What was that called? Sure, it wasn't the flood, but it wasn't all fun and roses either. But I didn't say any of that, because I am “conflict averse”. I just secretly dared him to be wrong but then to actually pray that he would be right.

“For the Animals, God! Let it be a warm short winter for the animals. Or for the children. Or something.” It's not about me. I am selfless and unconcerned about my personal comfort. It's for Others.

Tragically, I know that God knows that I'm lying. I really do care about my own personal comfort. So Very Very Very Much. More than I should. And if anyone deserves another long cold winter it's me, a sinner in need of suffering for the sake of Christ.

So prepare yourself for endless pictures of fall foliage. If you're sad about all the flower pictures, you'll be sad about this. I could take more pictures of the children, but, you know, Leaves!