In our culture, it’s common to hear some variation of, “Abortion is no one else’s business. That’s a decision between a woman and her doctor.” Others might say, “Abortion is an issue between a woman and God.” I give a response in this 2-minute audio clip. One of our EPM staff members also answered a similar question from a reader who wrote our ministry, expressing concerns about my prolife convictions.
I do hope you’ll avail yourself of my book Pro-Choice or Pro-Life: Examining 15 Pro-Choice Claims—What Do Facts & Common Sense Tell Us? It’s available to read for free online, and the print book is available for a low cost, making it great for ministries and churches to share.
Someone wrote EPM to say:
Randy, I know you and your wife are so pro-life, and I understand your feelings and beliefs, and I don’t like abortions either, but I don’t believe it’s your decision to make. I believe it’s between the pregnant woman and God. She knows how God feels about it. Everyone knows how God feels about it.
Can you imagine your 10-year-old daughter being raped and then pregnant, and what a pregnancy will do to her mentally and physically? I believe the unborn child will go to Heaven and be with Jesus and will be loved so much.
I can’t even download your book Pro-Choice or Pro-Life? because I’m afraid it will make me not want to read any more of your books. I respect your feelings, but I don’t think you should preach to women, making them feel horrible. I’m also afraid to find out if you support certain political leaders based on your beliefs about abortion.
One of our staff responded:
I’m replying on Randy’s behalf. I appreciate your honesty in what you shared. One of the things that Randy has frequently said over the years is, “The greatest kindness we can offer is the truth.” Your email mentions the humanity of the unborn child, and that is where our focus has to be and why Randy believes truth needs to be shared, in a spirit of grace. Scripture tells us, “Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves” (Proverbs 31:8).
If a child were not involved, then this really would be a private decision between a woman and God. But because there is a baby involved, the greatest kindness we can offer others is the truth about abortion. Just imagine if we applied a similar line of thought to other injustices: “Child abuse is between a parent and God.” “Rape is a decision between a man and God.” “Slavery was a decision between a slave owner and God.” All of those statements leave out the person who is being abused and victimized by those decisions. Someone could say, “Everyone knows how God feels about child abuse, rape, and slavery.” But knowing what God feels/says about something is exactly why we should speak out against an injustice.
Randy writes, “It seems to me that the only good reason for personally opposing abortion is that it kills an innocent child. If it doesn’t, there’s no need to be against it. But if it does, then you should not just refrain from it yourself—you should oppose others doing it also. You should favor laws to restrict it, for exactly the same reason you favor laws to restrict rape, child molestation, and murder.”
The 10-year-old girl being raped and facing a pregnancy is horrific to imagine. As a mom of two daughters, my heart breaks to think of a precious girl going through such a terrible situation. But the truth is that an abortion cannot take away the pain and the trauma of a rape; it will only add to the trauma. Situations like these do not change what’s always true: an unborn child is precious, created in God’s image. Our anger should be focused on the perpetrator, who should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law, and the girl should receive much-needed help, support, and counseling.
Life is a beautiful gift from God, even when we can’t see that beauty at times. There are so many amazing stories of people (like Ryan Bomberger) who found out later that their biological mom was raped and yet their mothers chose life for them. But their beginning does not change their worth. Randy once had a woman come up to him after he spoke on this subject. She wept as she said, “Thank you. I’ve never heard anyone say that a child conceived by rape deserved to live. My mother was raped when she was twelve years old. She gave birth to me and gave me up for adoption to a wonderful family. I’ll probably never meet her, but every day I thank God for her and her parents. If they hadn’t let me live, I wouldn’t be here to have my own husband and children, and my own life. I’m just so thankful to be alive.”
The other aspect to all of this is how abortion harms women mentally, emotionally, and physically, which Randy talks about in Pro-Choice and Pro-Life. He writes, “By talking about abortion—with grace and truth—we will prevent abortions and offer forgiveness and healing to women and men who are suffering in silence.” This isn’t about making women feel horrible; it’s about sharing the truth in love so abortions will be prevented and so that women who have experienced abortion can experience God’s forgiveness. “The truth will set you free” (John 8:32). There can’t be healing without truth shared.
I would like to encourage you to read Pro-Choice and Pro-Life (which you can do online for free). I believe it will help you think through some of your positions related to abortion. Yes, you may find some of your thoughts challenged, but I think knowing something of Randy’s heart on other topics will help you as you read. This isn’t a political book because abortion at its heart is not a political issue; it’s a human rights issue. Would you be willing to ask the Lord to impress upon your heart any areas where it might need changing? We can trust that He is good, and His Holy Spirit will lead and guide us to all truth (John 16:13). No matter what, you’ll only be more informed as the book will help you think through your positions and know the “other side” of the argument. That can help you as you talk about this subject with others.
We wish you all the best. God bless you.
Photo by MART PRODUCTION