Lent…or lack thereof

Here we are, almost at the end of Lent. It has gone by so quickly, and yet it never really seemed to get going at all. I missed going to church on Ash Wednesday because of sick children. After developing a wheat allergy with the birth of #5 last year, there wasn’t much I could give up that seemed like a sacrifice. Giving up all things wheat is tough, chocolate is easy by comparison.

I gave up clutter. I took a bag of stuff either to the trash or to Goodwill every day that we were home. It never got hard to fill those bags. How is it a sacrifice if I can do it quickly and miss nothing? I thought it would start off easy and get progressively harder. Nope. I guess we just had that much stuff. I tried to challenge myself, but I feel as if the effort fell flat. It’s depressing. Lent is my favorite time of year because I like the challenge of it all. Without the challenge, it has just seemed to be more Ordinary Time.

I want a do-over. Does it work that way? Can I make a sacrifice for the 40 days after Easter? Somehow that seems wrong, too. The time after Easter is supposed to be spent in rejoicing over the Resurrection. It is a feast time. Would it be wrong for me to be penitential in a time of rejoicing?

I need to talk with my priest about these things and ask his opinion. He already laughs at me and thinks I’m a bit strange. This will just confirm it in his mind. I am the crazy Catholic revert that they warned him about in the seminary, I guess.

I feel cheated of my Lenten experience, does that lessen the joy of Easter? I certainly hope not. Next year, I’m giving up something hard like chocolate, long, hot baths, or new shoes. I don’t know though. It all seems a bit easy compared to His sacrifice. I’m not ready for self-flagellation just yet, but somewhere between that and chocolate would be just about right.