I’d Demand a Refund

My sweet mother in law and I went to the Senior Art Show at the University of Oklahoma over the weekend. Her niece is graduating with a degree in graphic design, so we went to see her stuff. (It was amazing!)

Her niece told us that the fine art students were having their show on the 2nd floor if we wanted to check it out, and we did.  I have to admit that I LOVE art.  Love it.  I studied it in high school, a bit in college, and go to art shows and museums whenever I get the chance.  All that to say I get the whole weird art thing.  I understand existential angst and love to listen to artists try and explain their creations.

But this weekend……this weekend I couldn’t help but look at the senior projects as a mom.  Some of them were witty or clever, some were amazing and thought provoking, there was one of such breath-taking beauty that I would have happily carried it home.

Then there were the two that would have p*ssed me off if I were the mother of either “artist.”  One was a can of spray glue.  That was it, a can of glue.  This kid went to Wal-Mart, paid $15.99 (according to the price tag) put it on a pedestal and declared himself done.  The other student made a paper airplane and hung it from a broken rubber band.  (It wasn’t even a good paper airplane.  I made better ones in 3rd grade.)  I listened to the explanations of both “artists” and they couldn’t even spin decent stories.

Senior shows are supposed to be the culmination of 4 years of art education.  They are meant to show a student’s best work and potential.  If I had been the mom of either of these boys, I would have listened carefully and then held out my hand and said, “You owe me $100,000.”

‘Cause if they’re not even going to try?  On the one day when their parents get to try and be proud over blowing the cost of a house on art school?  “You owe me 100 grand and I want my money back…..oh, yeah….and take a shower, get a haircut and discover deodorant, you hippie!  I spent all this money so you could lose your sense of personal hygiene along with your good sense?  I want my money back!”

That’s what I would say if they were my kids. So, if you’re my kid…you’ve been warned.  I want more for my money than a sorry paper airplane and a broken rubber band.  For that kind of money you could at least add some glitter.