There’s a woman from Oklahoma who I know, but not as well as I’d like. We knew each other peripherally when we lived there, and there are many days that I wish I’d had the time and the opportunity to know her better. The more that I see of her family and the way that she lives (through the magic of social media), the more I’d like to spend a day in her kitchen drinking tea and soaking up her wisdom.

Her daughters started an online t-shirt business last year called Pray Hustle Repeat. They have some cute shirts, but there was one that took my breath away…not for the shirt itself, but for the message that it carries.

True. Kind. Necessary.

It was the way their mother taught them to speak to, and about, other people. “Take a moment,” she would tell them, “and ask yourself ‘Is what I’m saying true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?'”

I’ve thought long and hard about this since I first read it a few months ago. I’m a girl who likes to talk, which surprises absolutely no one who’s ever met me. I love to tell stories and listen to stories. There’s nothing better than an afternoon spent with skilled raconteurs (that’s just a fancy way of saying storyteller, y’all) as they relay the dramatic happenings of their lives.

I’ve learned a lot from people’s tales of woe and achievement. I’ve sighed over lost loves and told a few anecdotes myself, but while I try not to gossip, I don’t really have much else in the way of a filter for my mouth. Until now.

For the past week, I’ve been sifting everything I say through True. Kind. Necessary. and I’m finding that a lot of what I feel like I have to say doesn’t actually need to be said at all.

Over and over in the Bible, we read the admonition to Be Still and the blessing Peace Be With You…and I’m realizing that I’m neither still nor peaceful. It’s not a part of my nature, but I ache for it to be. So this is where I’m starting, with my words -True. Kind. Necessary.

We’ll see where it goes from there.