July 12, 2010

Back around New Year’s Day, when people were making resolutions, many of the good ladies of the internet were sharing their plans for self-improvement.   They all had long and laudable lists to accomplish, but they wanted to avoid that all-too-common problem with good intentions:   losing focus, petering out, or just plain forgetting. To avoid this pitfall, they planned to distill their finest aspirations into a single, pregnant word.  They would post this word in a prominent place where they... Read more

July 9, 2010

Just a quick note:  I just posted on The Inside Blog, if you’d care to take a look.  Eventually, I will grow enough brain cells to have a sidebar for this kind of thing (and a blogroll, and a reader . . . ) on my own blog. But don’t forget to read today’s other post, below, which is much more fun! Read more

July 9, 2010

Today for 7 Quick Takes, hosted by Jen Fulwiler at Conversion Diary, I’m sharing what we’ve learned from years of research in the field of toy-buying.  If you want to do your own seven quick takes, add your link to the list at Jen’s website, and don’t forget to link back to Jen on your blog. 7 Quick Takes:  Toy With Me edition From the beginning of April to the middle of July, five of our eight kids have birthdays.  ... Read more

July 8, 2010

(picture source) (and may I add that the difference between this guy and most other guys is that his tush is in front) BEHOLD THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN: (A true story — not about me, though.) Woman:  Hey, our 20th anniversary is coming up, and we have a little extra money.  I was thinking it would be really practical, and kind of romantic at the same time, if we went out together and got replacements for all our... Read more

July 7, 2010

You all surprise me.  You really do.  As I write, there are seven comments on The Jerk’s first movie review, and not a single one expressing moderate to quivering righteous indignation at the implicit endorsement of a trashy piece of work like Roadhouse.   I was expecting a nice loud chorus of, “AND YOU CALL THIS A CATHOLIC BLOG?”   Boy, if this were Inside Catholic, I’d have been excommunicated at least twice by now (although the second time wouldn’t count, because Pope... Read more

July 6, 2010

NOTE:  Welcome, Faith and Family readers!  The following post is a new feature on I HAVE TO SIT DOWN.  You  may find it somewhat less edifying than my article on Faith and Family Live today.  That’s because it’s written by my new co-contributer, who is a much less edifying person than I am.  Beyond that, there really isn’t any explanation for what you are about to read. ———————————————————————————————– Hi, I’m The Jerk. You may remember me from such blog comments... Read more

July 5, 2010

Good morning!  Last week, I told you my favorite joke, and asked for yours.  (If you still want to send me yours for pubbloglication, don’t put it in the comments – mail it to simchafisher@gmail.com.) So my second favorite joke was actually sent to me twice!  More coincidence:  it was sent to me by two sisters!  Furthermore, if you can believe it, they both happened to by my sisters, which may explain why the joke hit that sweet spot for... Read more

July 2, 2010

Hope This Helps Edition In which I solve seven common problems   –1– Did you spill soy sauce all over the place?   Need a mother’s day present?  Or just a crapload of squares?  Try this amazing new product. –2– Are you a really, really good mother who somehow understandably forgot to brush your daughter’s hair for a week, and as a result did not catch her major head lice infestation until a well-meaning relative, who probably mostly just wanted everyone... Read more

July 1, 2010

Jane (The View From the Foothills) gave me a lift by asking, Is there any chance you could re-publish your story on defrosting the hamburger in the washing machine.  A very good friend of mine is about to have her 4th child and I would like her to have a  fabulous laugh.  That story, which I passed along a lot when your old blog was up, has kept many friends laughing over their life with a newborn mistakes, “Well, it... Read more

June 30, 2010

photo source I’ll admit it, I felt great watching the first half of Inglourious Basterds.  We saw it a few weeks ago, and it was exactly the palate cleanser I thought I needed after that appalling gorgon Helen Thomas gave tongue to her revolting little swan song.  It wasn’t Thomas herself who gave me concentration camp nightmares.  What really made my flesh crawl were the throngs of little cockroach voices cheering her on in comboxes everywhere. (They feel safe to... Read more


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