Cellar door

Cellar door July 2, 2012

Seventeen years of tireless labor by a mind blessed with a profound understanding of human vanity, with unparalleled gifts of sensory perception and the figuration thereof, and with one of the greatest prose styles in the English language produced a work that all too often, and for long stretches, can remind the reader (when not recalling Yertle the Turtle) of the Spike-Milligan- meets-Edward-Lear prose tossed off by the Writing Beatle in five minutes between tokes and takes of ‘Norwegian Wood.'”

“What is it about Bruce Springsteen that causes conservatives to so spectacularly miss the point?

“He’s been called the father of nonviolent struggle. He could be also described as a revolutionary’s best friend. Or perhaps, more accurately, as a dictatorship’s worst nightmare.”

“If you are a straight Christian who believes that you are doing God’s work by continuing to condemn same-sex relationships, please read these letters.”

“Birth control, marriage, divorce, married priests, female priests, same-sex marriage — it’s all sex, sex, sex. They’re sex maniacs.”

“My hope is that when those confused old shepherds have passed away, a new generation of Catholic priests, bishops, cardinals, and popes will include openly gay, straight, single and married men and women — people who will not be interested in sticking their noses in Catholic bedrooms but will instead be focused on amplifying the unconditional love of Jesus.”

Why do you deny the people cleaning your buildings a living wage?

“Republicans in North Carolina’s Senate do not consider forced sterilization by the state a great crime against personal freedom and liberty.”

The loving Christian values of the “Teavangelicals.”

He is as rotten a human being as can be found anywhere under the flag; he is a shame to the American nation, and no one has helped to send him to the Senate who did not know that his proper place was the penitentiary, with a ball and chain on his legs.”

What happens to a body exposed to outer space?

“Jesus, we know, was a darn good debater and wins every exchange recounted in the gospels. Except one. Jesus loses once.”

On her best day, she can lift more than 568 pounds — that’s roughly five IKEA couches, 65 gallons of milk, or one large adult male lion.”

“This is our story. We get to decide what to take from it.”

What it costs to keep Lord Ray looking like Jesus” (via Bilgrimage)

“Closet cases terrified of being exposed. A hall of shame

This Is Climate Change

(“This famous linguist once said that of all the phrases in the English language, of all the endless combinations of words in all of history, that Cellar Door is the most beautiful.”)

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