7 things @ 9 o’clock (11.19)

1. “Seriously, right-wing comedy people, when will you learn that it is just not funny when you punch down? Having a bunch of not-poor guys sit around and mock the poor for the awesome funniness of being poor does not make for incisive comedy. An utter lack of humility or self-reflection does not make for funny.”

2. Tour of duty: I linked to this piece by Adam McHugh a while back, but Internet Monk just reposted it, and it’s still a daunting, haunting, honest, beautiful thing.

3. “Kory Lundberg, a Walmart spokesman, said the food drive is proof that employees care about each other.”

Well, somebody has to care about them, and it certainly isn’t going to be their employer, or their pastor, or their Republican representative in the gerrymandered House.

4. So today, Larry Klayman and an assortment of far-right loons are gathering in Lafayette Park, across from the White House, for the “Second American Revolution.” There in Washington, Klayman says, millions of white patriots will demand the resignation and/or military removal of President Barack Obama, after which Klayman and Co. will head to Philadelphia for a “Continental Congress” in which, he says, “delegates of the tea party and other patriots from all 50 states will deliberate, plan for the rest of the revolution and elect a government in waiting.”

No, the public doesn’t get to vote for Klayman’s new government. The public democratically elected a black guy — twice — and in Klayman’s eyes, that means we’ve forfeited our right to live in a democracy and must now submit to the revolutionary rule of our tea party overlords.

So the Second American Revolution starts this morning with, Klayman says, “millions” of patriots gathering in D.C. Later today, the Washington Wizards host the Minnesota Timberwolves at the Verizon Center (capacity 20,308). Which event do you suppose will draw a bigger crowd?

5. In Luke’s Gospel, Jesus says, “Whoever comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and even life itself, cannot be my disciple.” The United Methodist Church takes this extremely literally, apparently, and has judged a UMC pastor “guilty” of the “crime” of officiating at his own son’s wedding.

Note to every Methodist clergyperson who remains in good standing with the denomination: Everyone you meet is now forced to conclude that you must be a total jerk to all of your children. That’s apparently the only way for a UMC pastor not to be found “guilty.”

So if you have kids and you’re not being put on trial by your United Methodist denomination, we’re forced to assume you’re treating those kids abominably, as per denominational “law.”

6. Sarah Posner: “Kenneth Copeland’s Protectors”

In 2007, Sen. Charles Grassley, then the ranking member of the Senate Finance Committee, began investigating the activities of six televangelists, including Copeland, to determine whether they were misusing their tax-exempt ministries for profit. …

In early 2011, the Grassley investigation was over, with little to show for the Committee’s efforts, and those of the Trinity Foundation, whose indefatigable sleuthing had led to the Senate’s intervention. Rather than recommend or initiate any government oversight, Grassley’s staff opted for self-reform” within the televangelist community. Why? Because, according to the Committee’s staff memo, there was a “high level of distrust” of the government by the churches under investigation and the religious advocacy groups that supported them.

No need for legal oversight, because legal oversight is done by gubmint and we don’t trust gubmint. Which means we have to trust Kenneth Copeland, Benny Hinn, Joyce Meyer, Creflo Dollar, Eddie Long, and Paula White instead. And we have to trust them even more, because we can never hold a bunch of lawless televangelists democratically accountable or vote them out of office.

7. At this point, Kmart is just trolling the schoolmarms of the religious right. But they do it well: