The Campaign about Nothing

Now that my furnace is fixed (and I seem to have another of those blasted ear infections) today is the mental health day I tried to take yesteday. I leave you the gem of the day, Vanderleun taking off from the famous “Salsa/Selter/Show-about-nothing” episode from Seinfeld (clip below) and runs with it, brilliantly. The only trouble is…remember, America loved the “show about nothing.”

Obama: You know it must be impossible for a Spanish person to order seltzer and not get salsa. (Angry) “I wanted seltzer, not salsa.”

Hillary: “Don’t you know the difference between seltzer and salsa?? You have the seltzer after the salsa!”

Obama: (Just throwing it out there): This should be the campaign.

Hillary: What?

Obama: This. Just arguing. Arguing about nothing.

Hillary (Dismissing): Yeah, right.

Obama: No I’m serious. That sounds like a good idea.

Hillary: Just arguing? What’s the campaign about?

Obama: It’s about nothing.

Hillary: No real policies?

Obama: No, forget the policies.

Hillary: You’ve got to have policies.

Obama: Who says you gotta have policies? Remember when we were voting for… for that Senate resolution that proclaimed ‘making good people feel good is a good thing’ that time? That could be a whole presidential campaign.

Hillary: And who is running in this campaign about nothing? Who are the candidates?

Obama: I could be a candidate.

Hillary: You?

Obama: Yeah. You could run for President as a woman who is not really a woman, except when you cry, and I could run for President as a black man who is not really a black man, except when I go to church. Democrats would buy it. They really would. They’re Democrats!

Hillary: So, on my campaign trail in 2008, there’s a candidate following me around named Barack Hussein Obama?

Obama: Yeah. There’s something wrong with that? I’m candidential. People are always saying to me, “You know you’re a quite a candidate.”

You’ll want to read the whole thing.