The Ancient of Days…

Do not be afraid of this piece, and don’t email me with a wagging finger, admonishing me for posting something written by someone who has the phrase “new age” in her general vicinity.

Just read this and marvel at the truth of it, a truth you will feel acknowledged in the surge of your own marrow.

Marvel at the way the Most Ancient of Days has gotten all up inside this writer’s head, and completely overwhelmed all of the “new” and “modern” ideas she has held on to for so long; how she discovers her truly valued and respected “personhood” within the realm of prayer and shared faith.

…There are so many reasons why I should not be comfortable attending this minyan. Not only does does it take place early, I have to stand in a stairwell. I cannot even see the men, for they are upstairs. I can’t even see the Torah. I am a bit of a feminist…yet none of this bothers me. I am actually grateful to the men for allowing me to be present in the stairwell. I even appreciate the total separation as it allows me and the women to go deeply into the prayer without the concern of being observed.
…
ONE TIME, one of the male congregants in the upstairs minyan pointed out the man who had led the davening that morning. I thanked the leader profusely, for I had received so much from his davening. He immediately came over, put his hands over my head and blessed me. I was thrilled, for I felt as if I had been blessed by the high priest. The gesture made me feel welcome and confirmed to me that I was in the right place.

Most of the times when the men exit through the stairs where the women are standing, I avert my eyes because I know that some of them might feel uncomfortable being seen. Other times, they drape themselves with their prayer shawls so as to not look upon the women. Having shared this awesome experience of holiness, making eye contact seems too intimate. In years past, I might have been offended by the lack of acknowledgement of my personhood. Now, I am simply grateful to each of them, not only for what I have received spiritually for myself but for what these prayers offer to the Jewish people and to the world.

Put your fear away, and your skepticism, and your assumptions (I had to put mine away, too) and just read this thing of beauty and truth.

My heart flies to Jerusalem, and I wish, O I wish, I could be there, in this cave, resting up on the wall and listening…hearing.

Thanks to Hantchu for sending it my way.