Being a single parent isn’t so bad. There are worse things. Trust me…

Being a single parent isn’t so bad. There are worse things. Trust me… January 8, 2012

… Being a single parent isn’t so bad. Trust me on this one. Of course I am not advocating single parent households over the traditional model of family, which I know to be superior, but I want women who may find themselves debating abortion because they have no support from the father to know that being a single mother is not worse thing out there. Again, you’ll just have to trust me.

Right now you may be hearing the typical arguments from family and friends about the financial burdens you’ll be placed in raising a child alone. You may also be told tales of woe about how you will have to give up your dreams and life in order to do double duty and take up the slack of an absentee father.

Yes, these are all the realities that await a single parent; however, that doesn’t make these realities devastating or life ending. These are all very small things to endure and over come in comparison to the life long guilt and pain you will experience from having an abortion. People have overcome greater adversity – loss of limb, paralyses, death of loved ones, battles with cancer, religious oppression, torture, the Holocaust.You name it. Being a single parent is trivial in comparison and you are stronger than you think you are. Please, just trust me.

Notice I didn’t say being a single parent is easy. Even in a two parent household parenting is still difficult. I said it wasn’t so bad. And it isn’t. But just because something is difficult doesn’t mean it can’t be done or shouldn’t be done at all. If that were case no one would do anything ever.

Really, you’re going to have to trust me. I’ve had pets run away from home, burned enough meals to have fed a small country, killed every houseplant I’ve ever owned, and set my front yard on fire [true story!] yet I’ve managed to successfully raise a child on my own. Take heart in the knowledge that you are not expected to be a perfect parent or have a perfect life and you will be just fine.

If your parents are mad at you for being pregnant and unwed they will forgive you. The minute they hold their grandchild in the arms they’ll come around. If you are a teenager or college student and are worried about school, know that school will always be there. You can take courses online or go back to school and finish your degree when your child starts school. Six years seems like forever to put your plans on hold, I know, but it really isn’t. My son is nine and I swear he was just born yesterday.

Even if you’re a successful business women in the height of your career, know that your career will never love you like your child. Nor will it ever be as rewarding as parenthood.

Financially, you may argue, it will be impossible to raise a child alone. You’d be surprised how little a child really needs. All that baby stuff, you don’t need it. Also, your future child will not care in the least what kind of car you drive, house you own or rent, whether you or they wear designer clothes or own a smart phone. All that kids really need is love and you can provide that. I know you can .

Children are wonderful little beings that will change your life and I can sincerely tell you that out of the mistakes you’ve ever made and or going to make in the future, you will never regret the decision you made to follow through with your pregnancy and have your child. Even on your most weary and miserable days you will find yourself saying you’d do it all over again for the sake of your child. Trust me.

However, if you truly feel you can not be the parent your child needs there are plenty of loving people who are desperate to adopt. I encourage you to give adoption serious consideration because the only way you could possibly regret your decisions is if you choose the coward’s way out – abortion.

Yes, if you have an abortion you will feel like a coward the rest of your life. You will always doubt yourself and your worth. When you are faced with big decisions to make later in your life you will wonder if you have the capacity to make the right choice because you once lacked the courage to over come adversity and the challenges of life. You will also be tormented with regret, guilt and shame.

Abortion will scar you emotionally forever. It will hurt your heart and your body. Abortion can damage your reproductive organs and cause you all kinds of problems when you later decide to conveniently get pregnant… nasty things like incompetent cervix. I wouldn’t wish abortion on my worst enemy. No child deserves abortion, no matter how untimely is their appearance in your life.

Really, you’re just going to have to trust me on this.


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