Your Child Doesn’t Need Every Single Activity To Thrive

Your Child Doesn’t Need Every Single Activity To Thrive April 19, 2023

Omar Ram UnSplash: Children Playing Soccer

Grocery Store Meeting 

Recently, my husband and I were grocery shopping at our neighborhood grocer. As we approached the open cashier to checkout, right in front of us was a mom with three little girls. We were quickly drawn to them, waving and saying hello to them. Each girl had her own activity gear on (baseball, tennis and ballet). We complimented mom. She quickly replied that each girl is in three different activities this spring. She further shared that between her husband and herself, they rarely have time for anything else. We exchanged phone numbers to stay connected. This precious mom joined our non-profit weekly mentorship class for parents. 

Extracurricular Activities

There are many parents just like this family. They want their children to participate in extracurricular activities both at school and outside of school. Some of these parents work outside of their homes, and they juggle multiple activities each evening and even on weekends. Having children participate in extracurricular activities is not meant to consume the schedule of the entire family. Like anything in life, moderation is the key principle.

One Activity Principle

When our daughters were little, we had a guiding principle in participating in activities. Each daughter could only sign up for one activity in a semester (Fall, Spring and Summer). We made our daughters understand that the extracurricular activities were avenues for them to explore different things to find out if they wanted to pursue that activity in high school. Each of them had the opportunity to explore a wide variety of activities over their middle and high school years- such as basketball, volleyball, tennis, soccer, track and field, golf, cross-country, ballet, tap dancing, drama, debate, 4-H, piano, violin, Awana, mock trial, chess, newspaper writer, student council, national honor society and robotics.

College Application 

Sometimes, parents have their children in multiple activities because of their concern for the college application. It’s true, colleges look at extracurricular activities as part of their admission process. The college application process has gone from the simple process it was twenty years old to the complicated process we now have. This complicated process means students have to impress their intended colleges on their applications with their multiple over the top extracurricular activities. The standards set by this complicated college admission process invariably communicate to students that they have a better chance of being admitted to their colleges of choice if they are involved in a variety of extracurricular activities. With this approach, students tend to over stretch themselves and their parents. This can be very stressful for families.


Though this idea of needing multiple activities on college applications might be a concern for parents, as people of God, our assurance is not in the college process, but in God and His plans for our children. After all, God created our children and they belong to Him. This might shock you parents! You are stewards of your children and not owners. Stewards, give account of their stewardship, which believers in Christ will get to do according to Romans 14:12, “So then, each of us will give an account of ourselves to God.” Parents, let’s believe in God’s Word and His plans more than we believe in the college application process. This does not negate students working hard. It means, as a parent, you are not allowing the world standard to dictate how many activities your child needs to make it into college. Your child doesn’t need every single extracurricular activity to thrive. It also means, children will not allow the world system to dictate their worth by how many activities they can be in to get into college. Your children’s worth and yours have been determined by the only Person that saw it fit to pay the ultimate price of redemption with His own blood- Jesus Christ- Savior of the world.

About Dr. Feyi Obamehinti
Dr. Feyi Obamehinti is a wife, mother, an ordained minister of the gospel, Bible Teacher, speaker, life educator, author, co-founder of nonprofits Oasis Connection Ministries and Oasis Focus Inc. Dr. Feyi as she's known professionally, co-host Oasis Connection TV and Oasis of Hope Podcast with her husband-Dr. Johnson Obamehinti- from their home in Texas. As a life educator, Dr. Feyi loves to equip people with Biblical principles to thrive in every area of life. A dynamic international and national trainer/speaker, she is passionate about helping people "see life" from God's perspective - only one that truly matters. A national syndicated commentator, Dr. Feyi equips leaders on maximizing their leadership for the people they lead. She is an encourager extraordinaire of the Wellness Project, ambassador of hope, community leader and advocate. You can read more about the author here.

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