Discover the profound psychological insights of Carl Jung as they intersect with the realities of modern church leadership. This article delves into the hidden consequences of suppressing one’s true self, a common yet unspoken challenge faced by pastors and church leaders.
‘What you suppress becomes demonic’
The famous psychologist Jung once said, “What you suppress becomes demonic.” He did not mean that by doing so, a demon would actually gain space in your life. Jung had a different worldview than some charismatic Christians of our time. He meant that if you suppress something in your life, it always comes back at a wrong time to disrupt your orderly life. You can compare it to a shadow you suddenly trip over. It’s like a cluttered closet full of junk that just when your neat, tidy mother-in-law visits, falls open, causing all the junk to shoot into your living room at the wrong moment. It’s like an unpaid bill, hidden deep in the drawer, that comes back as a pounding bailiff at your door.
‘To put it bluntly: Christians are experts at suppressing’
Sadly, suppression is a deeply ingrained pattern in our heritage. To put it bluntly: Christians are experts at suppressing. Our faith has a centuries-long tradition of oppression. For more than a thousand years, we have oppressed non-believers and believers of other faiths. This oppression quickly became demonic. In the name of Jesus, the blood of millions of innocents was shed.
Time and again, we are confronted in the media with child abuse within the church. How much of this abuse will find its roots in the suppression of normal sexual desires at the behest of the church?
‘As a pastor, you can never really share your weakness and brokenness with your congregation members’
Unfortunately, we see suppression in various aspects of the church. I recently heard a pastor friend say that as a pastor, you can never really share your weakness and brokenness with your congregation members. “You’re there primarily for them. You can’t dump all your sorrow, questions, or trouble on them.” The danger behind this attitude is that as a leader or pastor, you can start to resemble a Mickey Mouse from Disneyland Paris.
‘You can’t suppress your true self at the expense of a spiritual image’
A Mickey Mouse character in Disneyland is terribly loved. Everyone wants a photo with him. You get hugged by everyone and are highly appreciated. But inside that Mickey Mouse suit is a sweaty Frenchman with a small mustache, who no one ever sees. These leaders are different on the outside than on the inside. This can go well for a while, but over time, cracks appear in your identity. You can’t play a spiritual Mickey Mouse on stage for years and be someone completely different inside. That will go wrong one day. You can’t suppress your true self at the expense of a spiritual image.
‘Some Christian leaders run the risk that they lose sight of their true self and their brokenness’
Another pitfall some Christian leaders fall into is that they eventually lose sight of their true self and their brokenness. With the Mickey Mouse example, you are aware that your image and who you really are far apart. The danger is greater if you lose sight of who you really are because you start to believe the projections of the congregation members, which they project onto you. They expect the leader to be the spiritual hero, the holy man, the one with the shortest line to God, the one who never sins, the leader without a shadow.
‘If you as a leader start to believe these projections, you lose sight of your own shadow’
They are all too aware of their shortcomings and their sins. But how wonderful for them that they can go to a church or congregation where the leaders are above these problems. “Our leader is such an anointed man…” If you as a leader are susceptible to this and start to believe these projections, you lose sight of your own shadow. As a spiritual hero on stage, you suppress your weaknesses and your brokenness.
‘Their names are erased from the evangelical history books’
Unfortunately, in both cases of suppression, a great fall is often the result. This great fall is often preceded by various small, personal, invisible pitfalls. This was invisible to everyone. When then the big blow in terms of sex, power, or money follows, the damage is beyond repair. Not for themselves, not for their families, and not for the congregation they were responsible for. They disappear ignominiously into oblivion. Their names are erased from the evangelical history books. Their legacy disappears like snow under the sun.
‘Suppression is a disease that has infected our churches and congregations to the core’
It’s almost unimaginable, but the suppression of who we are goes even further than leaders who fall. It’s a disease that has infected our churches and congregations to the core. Most Christians who meet each other on Sunday in a service or in another way within the church or congregation, suppress who they really are.
It’s as if a spiritual mask falls over us. We are different in our families than in the congregation. If we are honest, we also cannot be ourselves in church. That is something we were never taught. Like Saul, we listen out of fear to what others might think of us. We unconsciously worry about how they would judge us if we really showed who we are.
‘Churches where vulnerability and authenticity are suppressed are churches without true meaning’
We are afraid that if we dared to be truly vulnerable and show both our beautiful side and our shadow side, we would be rejected. So we all play our role. Unfortunately, this suppression also has its unconscious consequence. Churches where vulnerability and authenticity are suppressed are churches without true meaning. They are churches where no ‘real’ encounters take place, where no ‘real’ people live…
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