When I think about my attitude about control, I kind of feel like a crazy person. Almost like there are two parts of me at war with one another. The one part is absolutely obsessed with control. I want things my way. I want to have my cake and eat it too. I want to know what is going on, to predict (if not manipulate) how others are going to respond to me and be on the ready with a... Read more
One of the great challenges we face in our leadership training seminars is the motivation many leaders have for inviting us in. Too often, we see leaders who want us to swoop in and tell the employees to do what the boss tells them to do. These leaders want a culture of positivity and productivity and, to many of them, that means convincing others to do what they want. The truth is the best leaders don’t make anyone do anything.... Read more
I really value harmony. I don’t like conflict or division. It is like nails on a chalkboard to me. As such, I tend to avoid things. If someone texts me, it usually takes me a while to respond. And that is the best of circumstances. I’ve been known to completely ignore an awkward text or two. I tend to agree with whoever is right in front of me, trying to find the truth in their perspectives but also trying to... Read more
With the celebrations of July 4th looming, many Americans are contemplating what it means to be American. We live in a unique place in a unique time. The story of America is grand and beautiful and tragic. Many men and women have lost their lives to make it what it is. Many continue to make that sacrifice. Perhaps the word most Americans associate with our identity as citizens of this country is “freedom”. We pride ourselves on our democracy and our... Read more
Whether we are talking about an individual’s sense of satisfaction or an organization’s sense of purpose, the key to happiness in life is gratitude. Thankfulness is the most tried and true process for experiencing a life of fulfillment. I know it seems cheesy and cliché. But gratitude is much more than those things. It is scientifically proven to make one happier, healthier, and more likely to express a sense of meaning. And I also know life can be hard. We... Read more
I have to admit, I had big plans for 2020. We have been struggling with infertility for the better part of three years. Last Fall, we started going to a clinic and our hopes began to soar. As the calendar turned to January, I was imagining a 2020 baby in our future, as well as all the exciting things (the Olympics, trips we had planned, etc.) that would happen leading up to the baby. I was poised for the best year ever.... Read more
It’s a strange time to be alive. There are so many things that are outside of our control, so many circumstances we have to navigate, steward, and respond to. Lately, it seems there has been a barrage of circumstances in our lives. Infertility. Pandemics. Etcetera. It can be a lot to handle. With so much happening around us (that inevitably affects us), taking ownership of those three things we can control feels more and more like it is easy to say but... Read more
I know I may not be in the majority when I say that I think dads get a raw deal. I grew up with an amazing dad and I (not unrelated) have dreamed of being a father at least as much as I have dreamed of personal and professional successes, both of which are not true for everybody. But I toggle between sadness, disappointment, and anger at the way we talk about dads in our culture. We have adopted, hook-line-sinker,... Read more
The Project Mood Curve is a tool we use to help people and organizations transform the way they view challenge, struggle, and failure. Essentially, the mood curve is a mental model to help us see the journey of expectations to disappointment into perseverance, growth, and productivity. Everything we do follows the shape of the Mood Curve. All relationships, projects, and every other kind of human endeavor. The darn thing is inevitable. The only thing that varies is the depth to which... Read more
I am a high introvert, an internal processor, and a habitual emotion-stuffer. The number of things I think but do not say are enormous. The number of things I feel but do not understand are weighty. And I have learned the hard way the toll this can pay; not only on me but also on those I am in relationship with. Why The reasons I don’t always share what I am thinking are vast and not all of them... Read more
Victorious Living
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