Under this portrait in the book “Part Asian, 100% Hapa” is handwritten “Who am I? I am exactly the same as every other person in 2500.” “Would I be considered an Asian-American actor?” asked my stage-struck thespian son after we listened to an NPR story on a Filipino play—notable for how few Asian-American plays (and roles) are out there. “Probably—do you consider yourself Asian-American?” “No, not really.” “Do you consider yourself White?” “No.” “What do you consider yourself?” He smiled a little... Read more

I lied. I said I finished my series on race, but I’m not done—and I worry it makes folks uncomfortable out there. Because talking about race in America almost always feels uncomfortable. I spent last week at InterVarsity’s Multiethnic Conference.   350 campus staff of almost every stripe showed up—we had Blacks, Whites, Latinos, Asians, Natives, and Middle Easterners.  The Asian group alone included focus groups of East Asians, South Asians, Southeast Asians and Filipinos. I suspect it felt a little... Read more

Even though we had a great time on Tuanapalooza 2012, there’s something about being catered to, given unlimited quantities of food and treated extra special that led to some niggling issues/questions.  1.    Was I was exploiting the labor?  Over 50 countries were represented among the crew.  Our most wonderful head waiter, Teody from the Philippines, who made amazing napkin hats, watched over the kids while we all went to an adult dinner, and did magic shows, left 3 kids at... Read more

A week back from Tuanapalooza 2012 on the Disney Wonder, I’m back to my normal weight and happy to say it was a wonderful time.  Here are my initial reflections on how to go cruisin’: The whole family minus my husband who we missed very much 1.     Go for a family reunion.  Or friend reunion.  But go with someone other than your own immediate family.  Because unless you’re splurging on a concierge suite, the whole lot of you will be... Read more

This is the last in my series of blogs on race.  The previous ones are Why Aren’t People Talking to Me?, Do you Think Chinese Girls are Pretty?, and Why Louisiana Hot Sauce Didn’t Go With Chinese Stir Fry. 25 years ago, on a summer urban missions project, I put my foot in my mouth. “You look like Aunt Jemima,” I said to an African-American friend wearing a bandana over her head. She looked at me without a smile, “Kathy, it’s because I... Read more

In several hours, the kids and I fly to LA for Tuanapalooza 2012–a Disney cruise to celebrate my father’s 80th birthday with all of my family.  Scott, unfortunately, is the lone “Tuan Spawn” unable to make it because of his huge professional conference in Las Vegas–he’s on the board, running for chair, has to politic, etc. All week I’ve been asking the kids to pack.  I’ve been packing myself.  It’s winter here in Boston so none of us are wearing... Read more

During graduate school, I spent summers doing inner city urban ministry with a multi-racial bunch of students in the African-American community of Austin on the West Side of Chicago.  When you live in multi-racial community with several folks of each color and stripe, quickly the simplest issues have racial overtones. One night TC, a Chinese from Malaysia, made stir fry for dinner.  Two African-American women, Shunelle and Niecy, promptly drowned their dinner with gobs of Louisiana hot sauce.  As I... Read more

Even I, almost the least sports-inclined person in the world, am swept up by the excitement around Jeremy Lin.  Amazing what an Asian-American guy who’s excelling at NBA basketball can do for one’s ethnic identity, not to mention my son’s.  Add that Jeremy was part of the Harvard-Radcliffe Christian Fellowship (that InterVarsity supports), publicly (and seriously) talks about his trust in God, and continues to exhibit surprising humility even in the midst of a media frenzy, and I almost feel... Read more

Long ago, when my sister threw up on our nubbly green carpet, I remember being amazed as Mama calmly took care of her and then scrubbed the carpet on her hands and knees.  I thought, “I’m never going to be able to do that.” And sure enough.  I’m not. This morning, a kid was practicing piano and made a horrible gurgling sound.  I happened to be at home rather than the gym because I needed to interview a volunteer at... Read more

Those who follow this blog know that we’ve struggled as a family around work, especially housework. A lot. Maybe if I had trained better at this age. . . It led to Family Rehab last summer.  The deal was we paid more allowance, they did more work around the house without complaining.  We definitely paid more allowance, but their end of the bargain?  Not so much. And to make matters worse, not only did I not get a clean kitchen... Read more