A new year typically begins with advertisements on becoming ‘a new you’. Whether it weight loss products, gyms, fitness equipment, or updates from your Facebook friend who just got a new juicer and is positive that this will be the change she/he’s been wanting, only for a week later for that person to be checking in at Burger King or Instagramming a photo of the biggest plate of nachos you’ve ever seen. You don’t need a new you, because you are a beautiful and smart person, you just need to give yourself gifts of permissions. You don’t need to do what everybody else is doing. You just need to do what feels right for you.
We all have so many voices within our head. Voices that have been programmed within our subconscious throughout the years, whether it be your mother, father, grandparents, teachers, etc, it is a collection of judgments and opinions that we begin to accept as our own. And many of them aren’t at all honest or truthful. In fact many of them make our life very difficult, sad and painful. They are outdated beliefs that have nothing to do with your current life and it is that residue that is anchoring you away from yourself and your path.
Many had a tough 2013. And a tough 2012. And a tough 2011. Shall I go on? I found that 2013 was the year of shutting doors – the doors that were allowing us to feel inadequate and less than who we were. It was the year that spotlighted the negative and wrong people and situations in our lives, and it was the year that hurt many because of it. But with a closed door, comes many new opened doors if only you allow it. You don’t need to become new and better in order for 2014 to rock, but I hope that you will accept the gifts that you have, and utilize them. Because you are significant. Now it is time to give yourself permission to be you.
7 Gifts to Give Yourself
1. Give yourself permission to STAND UP FOR YOURSELF
Stop apologizing for others and start standing up of yourself. Stop saying ‘I am sorry’ when there is really nothing you are sorry about. Don’t apologize for your existence any longer and celebrate who you are. Learn how to say ‘yes’ and how to say ‘no’ and practice doing it.
2. Give yourself permission to WANDER
You don’t have to know the final destination. You don’t have to have all the goals secured. It is okay to wander and to experiment.
3. Give yourself permission to BE IN HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS
Start deleting social media people that aren’t in sync with your morals and ethics and instead surround yourself with those that inspire you. It is time to step away from the Billy Bullies, the Negative Nellies, and the Sarcastic Sams. They are just taking up room and using you to take out their own. Be careful of mourning toxic relationships because they aren’t the way you want them to be, or wish you had done this or that differently. Instead, give yourself permission to be in healthy relationships.
4. Give yourself permission to BE IMPERFECT
Stop beating yourself up about your nose, your weight, your money situation, or whatever else you criticize yourself for. Nobody is perfect in body, mind or spirit. We are a work in progress. Spend more time on your progress than your self-judgment. Embrace your own unique self and situation.
5. Give yourself permission to ASK FOR HELP
We learned in school that there are no stupid questions. We learn by asking. We grow by asking. We improve ourselves by asking.
6. Give yourself permission to PLAY
No work and all play…. Playing helps you feel more alive in body, mind and spirit. It keeps your spirits up and helps you reconnect with yourself. It’s time to create, to play, to have fun and to laugh.
7. Give yourself permission to LET GO
Do you have to keep holding that hot coal? Do you feel the need to keep hurting yourself over and over? That relationship that ended that you keep mourning. That job promotion you didn’t get. That bankruptcy that you had to take? Let it go. You have nothing to prove to anyone. Let go of the attachments that are causing everything that you want to happen, to stop making it happen.
I wrote on my Facebook the other day that about this time of year I typically have a plan for the next year, this being 2014. I normally have some things up my sleeve and an announcement to make. But this year I’ve got nothin’. And it doesn’t scare me (too much) to say it. Most end of years I look at all that I haven’t accomplished and depress myself. I think that getting the flu a few days before Christmas was heaven-sent. As miserable as I was, I didn’t feel well enough to analyze or punish myself, and I learned how to rest and just be (something I have never been very good at). Through what I would have previously called my lazy state because I was taught growing up that you go to work sick no matter what, but now will call it the getting healthy state. I realized I don’t need my own television show. I don’t need a huge book contract. I don’t need fame. I’m pretty gosh darn happy and satisfied. How’s that for an announcement?
When I finally let go of the outcome, I felt a rush of unbelievable opportunity. It isn’t that I don’t have aspirations or a vision, but I let go the need to control it all and with that, it leaves wiggle room. Just as I was writing this a hummingbird flew up to my living room window, looked in and flew away backwards. From Higher Intuitions Oracle – “Hummingbird tells you that it is essential to have crystal clear and concrete goals before taking action. Write down exactly what you want to achieve, your plans and your ultimate goal. You should be clear about your action steps in order to reach your goal. It is then you can see with clarity how you can reach your goal and become motivated in doing so. A positive attitude is a prerequisite if you wish to live a fulfilled live. It is when you believe in yourself, set a vision and put wings to your dreams that your life begins to feel purposeful.”
It is when you believe in yourself, set a vision and put wings to your dreams that your life begins to feel purposeful.
SPOILER ALERT – In the end, 2013 will end and 2014 will begin whether you are ready or not. And in the end, everything will be okay, but why just have it okay, why not make it fabulous?!
Happy New Year and Keep Believing,