I apologize in advance for this in-between post. My thoughts are a little vague.
“Maybe I don’t have to be good but I can try to be at least a little better than I’ve been so far.” Call me a southern kid, but these Avett Brothers resonate with me as much as any Church Father. And besides, I have the sneaking suspicion that they are Catholic, with lyrics involving “Mother Mary” and a focus on being fallen.
But that line I pointed out really sums up my thoughts today. God doesn’t expect us to be perfect. He is saddened by our sins, to be sure, but he’s not exactly jumping out of a celestial throne in shock, yelling “What? Marc screwed up again?” He gets it. He gets us. When God looks at us it is a look of love, not of expectation. Think about that for a second. In those rare moments when we are really gazing at someone we love, be it our Lover in the Eucharist or our spouse, our child or mother; our faces are not those of expectation. They are those of wonder and love. Granted we might be longing for those we gaze at, but we do not desire their immediate change, we do not gaze at them in the hope of what they might become. If we do, we objectify.
God wants us to be better every day. God wants us to give our best, knowing full well we will fail. So don’t wreck yourself thinking that He’s just sitting and waiting for you to be a good person. He’s not, He’s fully in love with you; all He asks is that you “do your best.” Which consequently, is why I believe you have to be dead to be canonized a saint. See, if it was just about being a good Catholic then the Church would canonize the good Catholics as saints where ever they found them, give them a cupcake, and that’d be it. As it stands, we’re all just bad Catholics trying our best, so we sure as hell better be dead before some one tells us we did a good job. Because its not about doing a good job, its about fighting the good fight, and a fight implies work, not perfection, and a real fight means you’re dead at the end.
So fight for perfection, but don’t freak out when you don’t achieve it. God loves you. End of story.
That Avett Brothers song wasn’t the best quality. I do believe I shall do them justice now.’