A President to Nourish Body and Soul

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Following the recent revelations about Trump, the Republican Party is scrambling for a new presidential candidate. Rumours started to spread this morning that they were considering a fine loaf of artisanal sunflower-seed bread. Reactions have been overwhelmingly enthusiastic.

“At last, a presidential candidate that we can believe in!”

“You can tell this loaf of bread is going to make a great leader.”

“It’s polite. It’s organic. It’s actually pro-life.”

“What a loaf!”

Amazingly, so far investigators have been unable to uncover evidence that the loaf of bread is guilty of gross incompetence, lying, or sexual assault. Polls predict a landslide victory.

Vote bread!

Picture credit Pixabay
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