You might be a disciple of Jesus if …

…you fit any of these characteristics.  H/T to Frank.

Check ‘em out:

1. You think Jesus wants to take over the government so you cut off a soldiers ear in order to get the fighting started. (The neo cons are definitely disciples!)

2. You keep pestering Jesus about who he will give more power to in heaven.

3. You have no theological training but own a small fishing business which somehow makes you qualified because you “get it.”

4. The Holy Spirit crashes into one of your mini sermons so everybody can speak different languages and outsiders think you’re drunk.

5. People ask you if you know Jesus and you freak out and say no and run away.

6. You hear they killed Jesus on a cross and you figure the whole thing was a wash and you got duped.

7. You choose other disciples by playing rock, paper scissors.

8. You teach bad theology and have to have somebody else come over and correct you.

Recognize anybody you know?

Comments

  1. Brilliant!!!

    You know traditionally these are top-Ten lists, so we need a couple more. I have an idea for #9:

    9. You get the vapours because Jesus hangs out with sinners, and even has dinner with them before they’ve repented!

  2. Charles Woodbury says:

    10. You look at the blessed Sacrament and see Jesus, as the apostles looked on a man and saw God.

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