If This is a Sin, I Don’t Want to Know About It

Ever since I was a little girl, I could get chills from listening to certain librarians and sales people when they spoke in quiet voices, while smoothing a page in front of them with a dry palm. If they sucked their teeth or swallowed frequently, so much the better. Without being touched, I felt like I was receiving a scalp massage from their palmy, tactile, dry-mouthed way of talking.Gently lift the book to read. Turn the pictures toward the listeners and oscillate from right to left. Flip … [Read more...]

When the Womb is Empty

I went to Mass this morning, and stuck around afterwards for the Rosary. There’s a group of old ladies who pray it together, and they add about a thousand additional prayers onto the end of each decade which takes forever, so I decided to say it on my own on the other side of the Sanctuary. The last time I did say it with the ladies, however, I was pregnant, and one of the ladies, who had just returned from a pilgrimage to the Holy Lands, brought some Nard to Mass and offered to anoint anyone w … [Read more...]

The Mom Who Cares

The whole family's in the car trying to head home from my parents' after three days of parties. It is late, and we are tired.One child does not like where he's sitting in the car. He creates obstacles to our leaving, like he thinks he dropped his airsoft gun in the driveway. He wants to go back and look, but we're not doing that because we're already gone. He begins a campaign to call my parents so they can look outside in the dark for his gun."Dad, can I use your phone to call … [Read more...]

Pope Makes Time for Autism, Can We?

When one of our children was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum disorder shortly after kindergarten at our Parochial School, we were told, "Of course your child is welcome to continue schooling here, but in the interest of full disclosure, he will have better access to services in the public system."Representatives from the public school system seconded the opinion, listing among their offerings full-time staff on sight to help enact a child's individual education program (or IEP), occupational … [Read more...]

The Cross of Blindness


I'm writing to remind myself that there is no other holiness than the holiness now, and there is no other Cross than the Cross right now. I want to live in the reality of them both, both the holiness and the Cross of exactly what I'm doing, even as I mourn just a little bit the things I'm not doing. If what-I'm-not-doing is the only Cross I've endured lately, things indeed go well with me.Saturday night, what I wasn't doing was partying in the basement of the Church with all the fun people … [Read more...]

Serious Men. Serious Toast.

My husband won a service award at work. Every now and then they pass out these little carrots for being a good company man, so you can go to the website, which resembles a Sharper Image catalog, and pick out some frivolous piece of gadgetry or a small appliance, and maybe conciliate your wife for all the stupid travel you've done lately. And I'll say, nothing makes up for your husband's absence like a Sonic toothbrush.But at this point, the only small appliance of which we had vague need was … [Read more...]

Between fatigue and falling down: Rapture!


One thing my sister won't tell you on her blog is that she is a very good runner, has been for many years, placed top ten in state cross country meets, still holds records at our high school and at Notre Dame U. After six children, she's still swizzle stick thin and a daily runner. In an excellent proof of forming a woman to form civilization, it seems her children might follow in her footsteps, as they've taken to entering these charity runs for leukemia and whatnot as a family, and sweeping … [Read more...]