Announcing The First Annual John Shore 10-Word Short Story Contest

writer

I just know this guy's entry will be too long

[Update: Bestselling author Jacquelyn Mitchard is now helping to judge this contest.]

Recently I spotted this for-sale ad on Craigslist: “Nike Triax c3 heart rate monitor and watch, used one time only.”

Which of course brought to mind Hemingway’s famous six-word story, “For sale: baby shoes, never worn.”

Thinking I can’t be the only person who digs this sort of novel-in-a-nutshell, I am now herein and forthwith announcing The First Annual John Shore 10-Word Short Story Contest. The rules to this contest are as follows:

As a comment to this post, submit a story consisting of no more than 10 (ten, diez, X) words.

Submit as many stories as you like or think you can get away before other people would wish you’d stop already.

The best of the submitted short stories will be chosen by a panel of illustrious literary illuminati consisting primarily, exclusively and peremptorily of me.

The author of the mega-short story deemed the best will win an autographed and inscribed copy of the near-bestselling book I co-authored, Comma Sense: A FUNdemental Guide to Punctuation (which Lynn Truss, the #1 New York Times bestselling author of Eats, Shoots & Leaves, called “a clear, entertaining, and just plain helpful guide to the American rules of punctuation”).

More than one story may be named winner, though I’m so sure.

All stories must be submitted by midnight, September 30, 2009. Winner(s) will be announced on the morning of Friday, October 2, 2045 09

Good luck. And don’t forget the motto of  The John Shore 10-Word Short Story Contest: Achieving attentiveness through anal retentiveness.

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About John Shore

John Shore (who, fwiw, is straight) is the author of UNFAIR: Christians and the LGBT Question, and three other great books. He is founder of Unfundamentalist Christians (on Facebook here), and executive editor of the Unfundamentalist Christians group blog.  (In total John's two blogs receive some 250,000 views per month.) John is also co-founder of The NALT Christians Project, which was written about by TIME,  The Washington Post, and others. His website is JohnShore.com. John is a pastor ordained by The Progressive Christian Alliance. You're invited to like John's Facebook page. And don't forget to sign up for his mucho awesome monthly newsletter.

  • James McNeil

    Secret of life discovered. Inquire within.

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    Boy did not meet girl. Happy ending was thereby assured.

  • Derek O'Brien

    A time traveller ended up beside himself with anger.

  • Martin Otto Zimmann

    "Kiss me," she said. " So he did. Onion breath. Ew.

  • http://www.myspace.com/whitenoisemetalpodcast Brian Shields

    The jasmine scent disappeared when George's fist deviated my septum.

  • Bruce Donaldson

    Jail door swings open. Few notice. Fewer believe it.

  • Bruce Donaldson

    Banana peel.

  • Bruce Donaldson

    Navy seal awakened by cat burglar.

  • Theresa Bernaard

    Tumbling into the grave, Throkmorton heard his mom laughing. Bitch.

  • http://www.kmendoza.com Kimberlee

    The decision was made to push the red button.

  • Mark Lattimore

    The caged bird wouldn't shut up. So, we ate it.

  • http://www.kmendoza.com Kimberlee

    The gladiator stepped into the arena. A Lion followed.

  • Turtle

    Rear window: "United States Navy". "Peace is possible". Quiet laugh.

  • RonH

    "I'll love you forever," he promised. And then, he did.

  • http://writingcanvas.wordpress.com Loni

    The next breath, is in heaven. Awe and praise begin.

  • http://writingcanvas.wordpress.com Loni

    Infant . . . toddler . . . teenager . . .bride . . .mama. A daddy's princess grown up.

  • http://writingcanvas.wordpress.com Loni

    Foolish games kids play . . . KILLS . . . mama misses forever. MatthewsStory.Com

  • Gwen meacham

    The Novel I could not write

  • Gwen meacham

    She never knew becasue she never heard

  • Gwen meacham

    Black and White only made it more Gray

  • http://www.epcomm.com/ddawson Dennis Dawson

    A real pony? That pickle _was_ magic! Thanks, Miss O'Magicalnannywhoewardsgoodlittlechildrenwiththeirheartsdesire!"

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    Oh. My. God.

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    God: "I've created Man."

    Angel: "Why?"

    God: "Wanted a laugh!"

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    Born.

    Played.

    Girls.

    Work.

    Marriage.

    Kids.

    Retired.

    Died.

    (Abridged biography.)

  • http://www.ChristytheWriter.com Christy

    I'm from Kansas, but I left.

  • onemansbeliefs

    Married the right Miss, a lifetime of wedded bliss…

  • onemansbeliefs

    He died and raised…

    I believed and confessed…

    We're one…

  • Gwen meacham

    I locked the door and opened the window~ to fly.

  • http://jerrisblog.blogspot.com Jerri Harrington

    The man wept in darkness. The world turned its back.

  • adam

    Survived. Exotic restaurant. Ordered albatross. Horror. Joe wasn't tossed overboard.

  • http://www.1truebeliever.wordpress.com wickle

    Omega Thirteen might destroy the universe? Activate it now. Oops.

    (Alright, that's a throwaway. I'll do a real one later.)

  • http://www.patheos.com/blogs/johnshore/2009/09/20/10-words-or-less-short-story-contest/ Leland

    The day began and ended with glorious chicken fried steak.

  • http://www.patheos.com/blogs/johnshore/2009/09/20/10-words-or-less-short-story-contest/ Leland

    Ted was on horseback, enjoying his iPod, when lightening struck.

  • http://www.tracetalks.blogspot.com Tracey

    Ruptured appendix while pregnant meant three months in the hospital.

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    Jesus walked on water. Female friend criticised: “Jesus cannot swim!”

  • mm

    TV: Sitting in a tub on the beach means sex

  • http://ramblingsofaspiritualidiot.blogspot.com/ Julia

    Unfathomable brilliance the tapestry unfolds; endless patterns in pertual flight…

  • Martin T

    God creates Universe.

    Man perverts it.

    So – Jesus fixes it.

  • Martin T

    Man loses job and his faith.

    No one believes him.

  • Bruce Donaldson

    Blind date. Great personality.

  • Martin T

    Parent loses child, parent dies of grief.

    Second tragedy worse.

  • Martin T

    "The Shadow War is over.

    We WON."

    …so Now What?

    (thanks and apologies to JMS)

    (quote from Epiphanies, Episode 7, Babylon 5 (Year 4))

  • Sarah

    Contractions start-oooooh, scared!

    Ten fingers, ten toes….Mommy….amazing!

  • Thom Stevens

    Extremely discreet taxidermist wanted. Must like children.

  • Steve Artrand

    “Fire!” screamed the commandant. But, as planned, everyone “missed.”

  • Bruce Donaldson

    Look ma! No hands!

  • Randy

    Child's request: "Tell me everything." Father's response: "I love you."

  • Latoya

    swallowed the first bite… saw half of a worm

  • Latoya

    He was.

  • http://www.epcomm.com/ddawson Dennis Dawson

    “Prison bars? They’re not Shore hard!” Rocky laughed, and ran.

    * * *

    I’ll never forget the day I was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s.

    * * *

    Mr. President, this time the soviets are not bluff-

    * * *

    “No antidote?”

    “None.”

    “How long?”

    “An hour.”

    “Pray with me?”

    * * *

    A child’s selfless act: congratulations, Charlie, the brewery is yours.

    * * *

    My God! Our alien hosts are fattening us for slaughter!

    * * *

    “Me? Marry my stuffy butler?” She ran into his arms.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Sometime I wish I wasn’t a dog. I hate vets.

    Dog bites man. “I’m innocent,” he says.

    She treated the waiter with such respect, I wanted her.

    (Cryout to a quotable quote – does brown nosing earn points?)

    The gunman glanced my way, “God damn, Mom. Not again!”

  • http://ramblingsofaspiritualidiot.blogspot.com/ Julia

    Mountains of old stand sure, Ancient Ones from long ago…

  • http://ramblingsofaspiritualidiot.blogspot.com/ Julia

    It's okay. We have him now. He is going Home…

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    So, there is an upside to a nuclear holocaust.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    The merry adventures of an amnesiatic neurologist

  • Greta Sheppard

    Happily married. Two single beds for sale. One never used.

  • http://www.sisterfriends-together.org anita cadonau-huseby

    Lesbian trades in apron and batter for hammer and ladder.

  • http://animbilivens.blogspot.com Casey

    He pulled the trigger; she died where she fell.

  • Tim Talbot

    God created everything perfect. It’s going downhill. Will end sensationally!

  • mm

    He slipped on the ice in summer, died in winter.

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    He fought in the war. Now his country fights him.

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    Stereotype wanted. Only disabled Mexican lesbian Muslim radicals need apply.

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    Two men fell in love. Killed by fundamentalists. God's love?

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    American discovers rest of world. Europe, Africa and Asia amazed!

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    "Don't worry," shouted Sergeant Evans. "Their snipers couldn't hit a…"

  • Samantha

    Kasparov was astonished, how did checkmate come about so soon?

  • Samantha

    "Eat grass??" The cows scoffed. "Bring us pizza instead!"

  • Samantha

    The cow moo'd too proud, abattoir called, hamburger now.

  • Samantha

    A look, a kiss, I will, I do, love forever.

  • Samantha

    Humpty sat on the wall. He fell off. Scrambled eggs!

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    Pig sneezes. Whole world terrified.

  • Ray Wolff

    God loves me so much His Son died for me!

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    The number of extraordinary stories told so succinctly amazed him.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    And he wept.

    LOL, with words to spare!

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    For sale: baby, never worn

  • http://animbilivens.blogspot.com Casey

    Wait! Are we competing against John? Cause that’s just unfair if we are. I kinda think all un-short story entry thingies should be longer than 10 words, just so we can identify them .

  • Sandra

    The sun beats down. No rain falls. Earth shrivels away.

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    You are not competing against me. I just wanted to chime in there to show that I was reading them–and then I thought it’d be cute if I SAID that in 10 words. But, no: If it’s from me, it doesn’t count.

  • Rich

    Having loved and lost, he questions how it's better.

  • http://ramblingsofaspiritualidiot.blogspot.com/ Julia

    (Correcting a typo from my earlier post):

    Unfathomable brilliance the tapestry unfolds; endless patterns in perpetual flight…

  • http://ramblingsofaspiritualidiot.blogspot.com/ Julia

    Shh.

    Be still.

    Be aware of the Holy….

  • http://ramblingsofaspiritualidiot.blogspot.com/ Julia

    They came, they saw, they conquered, they built a mall…

  • melcartera

    Six. Didn't know difference between loaded and toy. Stupid dad.

  • Don Renaldo

    And that's when she realized her husband was gay.

  • Beverly H

    Arms outstretched … means true love for all who believe.

  • MM

    Her hair was like flax, his memory is fading; remorse.

  • http://www.facebook.com/missmgmnt Shannon

    Life: Many some days until there are no days. Live!

  • http://www.facebook.com/missmgmnt Shannon

    Life can end so quickly… enjoy chocolate while you can!

  • Liz

    She required a head with long flowing hair.

  • http://www.facebook.com/missmgmnt Shannon

    I shop when I’m depressed; credit card bills depress me…

  • Liz

    Thank the Lord for the answer

  • Liz

    John Shore sent you a message.

  • Stephanie

    Jesus drafted in to the Army. Will it work?

    Free to a good home.

    Lesbians. Straight folk and Leprechauns.

    Is this a bumper sticker or a book?

    Jesus. The super hero.

    I took off the mask at the costume party.

  • http://www.facebook.com/missmgmnt Shannon

    Her love for him: everlasting. His love for her: conditional.

  • http://www.facebook.com/missmgmnt Shannon

    Homespun wisdom is often where ignorance abounds.

  • Liz

    Father: are those teeth?

    Mother: He is a newborn!

  • SteveS

    He came. He Saw. He conquered. Bored Now. He left.

  • jrc

    Four years later, and you’re still dead. We miss you.

  • http://anziulewicz.livejournal.com Chuck Anziulewicz

    It was a dark and stormy night. I stayed inside.

  • Vicki in NC

    No, you can't get that from a toilet seat.

  • Carol Rasumussen

    It wasn't a reason for living, but it would do.

  • http://wineymomma.wordpress.com wineymomma

    The Kindergarten class got a turtle. They named him Fluffy.

  • Sarah Childers

    He ripped the veil top to bottom. Mercy came running.

  • Stephanie

    He handed her the glass and said, "take and drink."

  • Bruce Donaldson

    He embraced her. Kissed her. Buzzards gathered.

  • Bruce Donaldson

    The clown's eyes betrayed his makeup.

  • Bruce Donaldson

    Ehhh…it's not like it's going to kill me.

  • Bruce Donaldson

    He sent her his left ear as a love token.

  • Randy

    Groom smiled walking down aisle. Future bright. Low maintenance wife.

  • http://animbilivens.blogspot.com Casey

    Two glasses. One has poison. choose carefully.

  • http://www.maranathachapel.org Tim

    Man 38 marries girl 21. Girl 38 divorces man 55.

  • Lisa

    She saw him take his last breath, it was breathtaking.

  • http://www.maranathachapel.org Tim

    The wiener was done. Forked over too many times.

  • http://www.maranathachapel.org Tim

    Backward diabetic was arrested for pricking his finger in public.

  • http://www.maranathachapel.org Tim

    Forgive me. I repent.

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    Yowzer! This has turned into a serious collection of REALLY good 10-word stories. You know, I'm thinking of putting out a call for a JUDGE or two to help me out.

    Anyway. Awesome. Some of these are just golden.

  • SteveS

    Beautiful gift, sold to enemy. broken. purchased back. repaired.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    The sign on the corpse read, “Will yodel for food”

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    The puppy was SO cute. And delicious with mint sauce.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Your cat, my tea cozy.

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    Okay. Now I'm afraid.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    The fortune teller was right, ducks would be my death

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    World domination was nearly mine! Next step: training attack pigeons.

    • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

      yeah so remind me not to ever ask you to take care of my pets …

  • http://animbilivens.blogspot.com Casey

    princess kissed frog. He lied about being a prince.

  • http://animbilivens.blogspot.com Casey

    child darted into road; driver couldn’t stop in time.

    one too many beers- never saw red light.

    label said 2 every 4- 6 hours. deliberate overdose.

  • Judy

    Heads rolled, and not in a good way.

    Thrasher's french fries are clogged arteries in a cup. Tasty.

    She tried and couldn't, so she took a nap.

    If God knows best, he wondered, why does it hurt?

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    The wedding was like The Matrix meets The Princess Bride.

  • http://richardzowie.wordpress.com Richard Zowie

    I sobbed endlessly: everything I knew about life was wrong.

  • http://www.patheos.com/blogs/johnshore/2009/09/20/10-words-or-less-short-story-contest/ Leland

    Unaware of confirmation requirement, greatest submission goes unnoticed. Thanks, John.

  • JG

    Beautiful girl with a son, brain tumor, MS, seeks love.

  • http://animbilivens.blogspot.com Casey

    he said the gun wasn't loaded. Obviously it was.

  • http://animbilivens.blogspot.com Casey

    'beware of dog' sign. Not a joke.

  • http://animbilivens.blogspot.com Casey

    Russian roulette not to be played with unlucky people.

  • http://www.patheos.com/blogs/johnshore/2009/09/20/10-words-or-less-short-story-contest/ Leland

    In the beginning was enlightenment. In the end, a tragic past.

  • Laura

    My Grandson "Dag" and me in trouble: "Dag", "Nabbit"!

  • http://animbilivens.blogspot.com Casey

    Accidently pulled pin on the grenade….. It wasn't a dud.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Teaching elephants to rumba was one of my lifelong regrets.

    “Oh Bernard, is there nothing you cannot do with glue?”

    "What to see in purgatory." The tour guide.

    Caramel ice-cream. If only arsenic tasted this good.

    A clear sky, a full belly, and a corpse.

    Cape or no cape? The eternal superhero dilemma.

    The wombat patiently waited for the trap to spring.

    Blue with mauve and other fine housing palettes.

    Witch seeking work. Has own flying monkeys. Toilet training required.

    As archaeologist’s buried her husband, she couldn’t help but notice….

    Bob the builder, childhood icon or satanic cult leader?

    Stumbling on the village of pigmies, I plotted my revenge.

    As a frequent hitchhiker, I’d dealt with murderers before.

    An abrupt guide to Himalayan yodelling.

    What is the worse that can happen? Adventures in yodelling

    What could go wrong? An amateur’s guide to bomb making.

    The sudden cessation of noise alerted him to the apocalypse.

    Finishing, the piano virtuoso waved his flippers to the audience.

    In the blizzard, Rudolf regretted his plastic surgery.

    Corpses are people too.

    The zombie slowly realised it couldn’t limbo any more.

    Having finished his opus, Herbert realised he had no friends.

    Adventures in governance: Monkey see, monkey do.

    I remembered the wok. Now, who brought the kittens?

    The day after the world’s end was slightly duller.

    Adventuring in phonics land, the letter Z felt ignored.

    Nude golfing, I realised my aptitudes were best used putting.

    Slowly, realisation dawned. Leprosy and macramé just don’t mix.

    ARGHHHH! Must stop procrastinating! Anytime soon. But. Words. Still. Left.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    My only regrets was that I didn't say: "Not teaching elephants to rumba was my only lifelong regret."

  • http://animbilivens.blogspot.com Casey

    nobody likes a drunk butterfly.

    gnomes are people too.

  • http://www.1truebeliever.wordpress.com wickle

    A blogger wanted lots of comments; he started another contest.

    Evil with new name? Heroes kick butt and take names.

    The family got together again, causing laughter and tears.

    Valentine's Day was awful … until the year I met her.

    Easter bunny stew was not appreciated by the kids …

    The singer lacked talent, but he compensated in volume.

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    (Okay, um … for what it's worth, I imagined I'd get in, like, maybe 30 of these. MAYBE. I had no idea my readers were such … well, writers. And freaks—but that's really a whole other concern. Now.)

    Hey, I like that fourth one–the Valentine's Day one. You old softy.

  • http://www.1truebeliever.wordpress.com wickle

    It was no joke — Microsoft is the bane of humanity!

    Once I adjusted, life as a zombie isn't that bad.

    Eve stuck with oranges that day. There is much rejoicing.

    It's lonely at the top, so I did not go.

    I told him not to cut the blue one first!

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Leading the tour de France, my fears were realised: haemorrhoids.

  • Mark

    After much deliberation, he decided he would become a nun.

  • calapitter

    Death gave her a chance to live.

  • Bruce Donaldson

    She was radiant and he had forgotten his mints.

  • donna

    How fortunate we are to have such a Blessed Hope!

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Joe despondently concluded Mime Auctioneers School wouldn’t work. Another failure.

  • Bruce Donaldson

    Free puppies. Unconditional love guaranteed.

  • barry carter

    I am in here, divine-waiting to be born.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Tonka toys, zero, son one.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Eve’s guide to making scrumpy: don’t.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    On centre stage, Beatrice forgot how to lip-sync to Milli Vanilli.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Bob the builder – seducing your children to evil since 1979.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Only through luck and foul play did Beatrice win scrabble.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Rodger employed his secret mime martial arts, subduing the bandit.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    The sign read: nude hand gliding not permitted in halls.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Beatrice’s blind date involved pygmies, mimes and duck. Not sequentially.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    “Sense and sensibility be damned.” Jane ordered another tequila bottle.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    With the mime lying dead, Beatrice thought: “Not again.”

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    With wishes, wings and happy thoughts, the mime suicide-squad attacked.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Beatrice suddenly realised, “The mime protection program was bankrupt.”

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Tango a no-go. The does and don’t of hippo dating.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Having eaten the fruit of good and evil, Bruce preferred lemons.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    The corpse’s sign read, “Will sing sea shanties for food”

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Turning from my life of crime, I started professional karaoke.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Trapped by the avalanche, I finally rued bringing the trombone.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    A goldfish’s memoirs, a goldfish’s memoirs, a goldfish’s memoirs, a…

  • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bq1JtIAG4Eg Shaw

    Sometimes I meow like a cat.

    Others, I bark like a dog.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Henchman wanted. Must have tattoos and exotic accent. No smokers.

  • Rich

    By the third take, the TV preacher wept convincingly.

  • http://www.xanga.com/delaferriere kris sexton

    I hate running but I want to be a runner .

  • Randy

    He helped his enemy. God smiled. Enemy finds the Lord.

  • Vicki in NC

    "He has adenocarcinoma of unknown primary. It's everywhere." The End.

  • Charmaine

    God created me, you and all to live forever…end..

  • http://www.maranathachapel.org Tm

    I'm loving Nathan's multiple storgasms. Does that mean I'm gay?

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    Yes.

  • http://www.1truebeliever.wordpress.com wickle

    There would never be another like tonight. For him, anyway.

    Who poisoned deviled eggs at the picnic? Sadly, the detective.

    Munching malformed mushrooms made Mary's May merry.

    We boarded the ship unaware of the trap. Ten, nine …

  • Sarah Childers

    He asked, "Do you love me?" Not the "phileo" love.

    Located the Fountain of Youth. Contact Juan Ponce de Leon.

    Tears were upon her face, like they always belonged there.

    A smile, a quick look, shy eyes- love happened! Wedding bells.

  • http://www.1truebeliever.wordpress.com wickle

    Dad snapped, "Don't be ridiculous! There's nothing under the …" Sluuurrrp!

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Tasting flesh, the wombat thought, “No more herbivore!”

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Mimic the cat eventually resigned from trafficking in human slaves.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Bloodied, I stumbling from the pygmy village, plotting revenge.

  • jrc

    He plans to live forever. So far so good.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Lipstick, napalm, kitten’s whiskers – a few of my favourite things.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    The duck waddled contentedly from the corpse. “Revenge IS sweet”.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    After three margaritas, the Stepford wives decided their husbands must die.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Succinctness is the brevity of wit.

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    For sale: genuine Japanese Kamikaze uniform. One careful owner.

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    No, this is not the way to Amarillo. Stop asking.

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    Tried to write ten word story but ran out of

  • jrc

    Her headstone read, "I told you I was sick."

  • Jessica K.

    Once, at church, Dad cried; my eight-year reality shifted.

  • Tim

    He rode the bus home from his dear wife's funeral.

  • http://www.epcomm.com/ddawson Dennis Dawson

    Dennis dipped his toes in the briny depths, pandering shamelessly.

  • http://www.epcomm.com/ddawson Dennis Dawson

    "Yes, I am your father. But I _was_ your mother."

  • http://www.epcomm.com/ddawson Dennis Dawson

    "Nurse! I think it's time!" Natalie turned on the television.

  • Cheryl

    "You from around here?"

    Randall turned. "Not yet, Sir."

  • Liz

    Wished I could do that. “Wish I could,” I’d say.

  • http://animbilivens.blogspot.com Casey

    adhd person found fountain of youth. then forgot it's location.

  • http://www.rachelatfirstchurch.blogspot.com Rachel

    Morning came, she took her last leave of the river.

  • Cheryl

    Wartime? He'd loved it — the deathclose ecstasy. They both had.

  • Sandra

    Fall returned again, pugently awash in color, spice and regret.

  • Sonn Dixon

    - The worst happened, and that is how my life ended.

    - Everyday starts the same. I open my eyes and stare.

    - Each hello was sadder than one thousand loved one's goodbyes.

  • Sonn Dixon

    Five fingers? I really have no need for my pinky.

  • Mark Lattimore

    "Stop being obsequious!"

    "Your wish is my command."

  • Mark Lattimore

    "Stop being obsequious!"

    "ok"

    (The Sequel)

  • http://www.epcomm.com/ddawson Dennis Dawson

    "It was a good fish, a big fish," thought Hemingway.

  • http://www.epcomm.com/ddawson Dennis Dawson

    Skeleton in bar: "Bring me a beer and a mop."

  • http://www.epcomm.com/ddawson Dennis Dawson

    "You cackle like an old hen," Max told his chicken.

  • Kimberly Onufrock-Br

    Glorious morning,endless possibilities. A quandry, stay put , open door.

  • Kimberly Onufrock-Br

    To hope,desire,satisfy my own. Freedom is my life.

  • Kimberly Onufrock-Br

    Wind blowing,crisp evening. I can feel my soul bating.

  • Kimberly Onufrock-Br

    Smells of home made bread baking,heaven is altered reality.

  • http://justdoyin.wordpress.com justdoyin

    Jesus was a great sales man. Want to know how?

  • http://www.xanga.com/delaferriere Kris Sexton

    He didn’t see a doctor because he didn’t have insurance.

  • Mark Lattimore

    Bashing his head in was her crowning achievement.

  • http://skerrib.blogspot.com skerrib

    John sent Kerri a book. And cash. The end.

  • Latoya

    Oh God. Some of these stories have me rolling with laughter!!! (this isnt an entry)

  • Martin T.

    I am alone…

    I want love…

    I will wait – patiently.

  • Martin T.

    I must live.

    I must give.

    I will live well.

  • http://ramblingsofaspiritualidiot.blogspot.com/ Julia

    First breath, the Flight of Life, Spirit singing beyond time…..

  • http://jerrisblog.blogspot.com Jerri Harrington

    In the midst of the mayhem, a butterfly paused, hovering.

  • http://jerrisblog.blogspot.com Jerri Harrington

    Who would reckon a simple touch could heal so deeply?

  • James McNeil

    “How hard can it be?” he asked, his eyes gleaming.

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    “OK, I admit it! I wrote the Book of Love!”

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    In space, nobody can hear you scream. Or break wind.

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    Enemies approached. James regretted beating his sword into a ploughshare.

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    John swung his golf club and hit his ball. Ouch!

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    “How do you keep your readers in suspense?”

    “Well, you…”

  • http://www.epcomm.com/ddawson Dennis Dawson

    “Again! Again! Hee hee.” Sticky fingers stretching out; Elmo winces.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Note to self: land mines and kindergartens don’t mix well.

  • Gary Sather

    Back from the moon so soon? Thanks for the cheese!

  • http://www.epcomm.com/ddawson Dennis Dawson

    “I will never tire,” thought Dennis, “of my own writing.”

  • jrc

    He lived on. Then he died to be with her.

  • Gary Sather

    Well, if it’s not water, what is it? You OK?

  • http://jerrisblog.blogspot.com Jerri Harrington

    He was born into poverty, but that was not all!

  • http://jerrisblog.blogspot.com Jerri Harrington

    To look at her face, you’d never know she’d gone.

  • http://jerrisblog.blogspot.com Jerri Harrington

    If he couldn’t behave better, then why did he apologize?

  • http://www.epcomm.com/ddawson Dennis Dawson

    “No! Prorate the expenses!” screamed Randy, updating the chimpanzee’s spreadsheet.

  • http://living3dfaith.blogspot.com/ Tim

    I was a bad boy.

  • Suzy Amis Haines

    Thirteen was a dangerous year. Woodstock, Viet Nam, first love, heartbreak.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Bruce, the angel, referred to himself as stooped not fallen.

  • Martin T.

    I wondered out loud, “What gives?”

    Then I woke up…

  • Martin T.

    Just ten words – but saying what?

    Eternity in a nutshell.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Pretensions and contentious? Whom Moi’? Au contraire!

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Maurice and the amazing dancing rodents rocked the leper colony.

  • http://ramblingsofaspiritualidiot.blogspot.com/ Julia

    From Light they once came, to the Earth they returned…

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Cheetah stealthily doped Jane’s Martini, “Now Tarzan will be mine!”

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    John,

    Do !, ; ‘’ or ? count towards the 10 word limit?

  • Judy

    Continuing to live seemed impossible. Dying was not an option.

    The girl known as Pinky began dancing to the uilleann pipes.

    The 6 limbed alien pitched horseshoes like a professional.

    Martin was so shocked he dropped his martini overboard.

    Foster lived in the attic with his iguana and ferret.

    Climbing the willow tree wasn’t as easy as Sarah said.

    Standing on the rooftop, Lillie longed to fly.

  • http://blog.writanon.com Mikal

    Practice, practice, practice. A contest, a winner! Fame and fortune.

  • http://animbilivens.blogspot.com Casey

    then they all jump off the roof and fly.

  • Bruce

    The nude model shivered; he draped a blanket around her.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Jane plotted to stuff Cheetah, turning him into a lawn ornament.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Every coffin has a silver lining. Sometimes it’s actually lead.

  • calapitter

    "If only…", she thought, "he might not have killed himself."

  • S Peters

    Nathan: Stop, already. I don't think there's a prize for quantity.

  • jrc

    He wrote his five ten word stories. Then stopped forever.

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    Hah! Good one. NATHAN.

  • Latoya

    Leave Nathan alone, He has found his passion! Plus he's quite entertaining..and scary

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    Really? That's such a sweet way of looking at it, Latoya! But you're young and live in Jamaica. It's all sunshine, mangoes, and cavorting dolphins to you. Let's take a vote!

    Readers: Do you think Nathan (of whom, let me say, I am terribly fond) should now stop submitting 10-word short stories? Or do you think he should keep on going until his hands seize up on him and/or he finally gets fired from is job?

    In your response, right "@Nathan" so we'll know it's not a story entry—and then share with us your opinion on this terribly critical question.

  • Latoya

    @Nathan. If they wanted to restrict you they should have made that rule from the beginning. Plus, what if your 100th story would have been the winner and you stop at 99?

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    @Nathan. Keep going, dude!

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    In youth they married. Her death was his life's end.

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    Oh my God. You people are bazoinkers.

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    Life. Busy emptiness, smoke, a pointless vapour. Existence without meaning.

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    Morning came. New hope, long denied to them, arose unbidden.

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    Okay, BARRY'S vote on whether or not anyone should QUIT submitting so many stories officially doesn't count.

    What am I going to do with you people?

  • Cheryl

    @Nathan: Keep going if you want to. They're funny!

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    Shortest Blues song ever: "I didn't wake up this morning."

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    He lived for his job. Retiring, he discovered his family.

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    @John: I think you've created a monster you cannot control!

  • Bruce Donaldson

    He twittered so eloquently she thought he must be French.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Beatrice’s murder spree began with a clear goal: Olympic gold!

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Maurice always harboured a secret curiosity, “How did nuns taste?”

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    John created a monster. It turned and bit his hand.

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    "Moo! Baa! Cluck!" said the cow – world's first bovine linguist.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Little Timmy often wondered, “Why don’t Penguins grow on trees?”

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Maurice preferred his nuns without relish. It was a habit.

  • http://www.wix.com/zacheus/Timothy-Fowler/ Timothy Fowler

    On the horns of a dilemma, he looked to God.

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Timmy habitually lost fingers in the blender, other kid’s fingers.

  • http://www.epcomm.com/ddawson Dennis Dawson

    Signore Schedarossa winked, "This green card gives me carte blanche!"

  • Latoya

    LOL@ Bruce. Barry: I think you have become monster number two

  • http://animbilivens.blogspot.com Casey

    @ I kinda think the top story submitters should get a book just for submitting so many. And you totally can’t limit us now, cause we’ve already submitted a bunch and thats not fair and in the article you did say that rule applies for next year. if you find certain people’s submissions excessive (Nathan) then by all means… submit more of yours. haha.

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    Time was reversed. Death became far more enjoyable than birth.

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    As a solipsist, she knew she would never be outnumbered.

  • http://honestfaith.blogspot.com Barry

    "House of Ontology," read the sign. "Come in and be."

  • http://www.aelc.edu.au/the-naked-ape-blog/index.html Nathan

    Guys,

    Don't worry about the rule change – I'm gonna lay off posting for a while (even though I've got this whole rift of tales from the zombie apocalypse worked up). Mostly because I finished the discussion paper on local government reform in Western Australia yesterday, up until then the sheer boredom of the topic had been my muse. Somehow I became the resident expert on the issue – bad karma I suspect (possibly I killed Mother Teresa in a past life).

    My final entry will be a summary of the 80 page discussion paper:

    No reform in WA in 100 years. Need some now.

    So, goodbye, so long, and thanks for all the fish. (Yeah – also only 10 words…I've gotta find some other way to procrastinate!)

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    Ahh… it's like the end of an era.

    (Hey, wait. There wasn't any rule change!)

  • RogerC

    Dear Dad,

    Borrowed the car for evening. Sleep well.

    Kyle

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    OK, back from being gone. So what happened with the Multiple Entries vote?

    Not much, I see. But the Eyes have it!

    Carry on, all! (Including you, Dennis, if you’re reading.) Submit away!

  • Rebeka Newbold

    The universe unfolds, every story is it’s own.

  • Sandy Anderson

    I should have married Mozart: he'd be alive today, composing.

  • Sandy Anderson

    The jury convicted Mother. Now I'm free to kill again.

  • http://www.epcomm.com/ddawson Dennis Dawson

    Wasted words wandering wine-dark seas — then, a signal from shore!

  • http://www.epcomm.com/ddawson Dennis Dawson

    Given direct orders from a superior being, Dennis humbly submitted.

  • Latoya

    Dennis you are hilarious! LOL! (Not an entry)

  • http://hayase.blogspot.com Linda

    George was thrilled. The golden treasure chest contained canned Spam!

  • http://robertadamson1951.spaces.live.com/ Robert Adamson

    When we part, you're the best secret going on….

    Sun:Sprinkling bright whites, laughing, without pain.

    Now alone on a cosmic wink, not color, not ink!

  • onemansbeliefs

    Doing His work thither. Waiting to hear, “Come up hither.”

  • Jennifer Newbold

    The alien in my belly returned to the unknown.

  • http://animbilivens.blogspot.com Casey

    uh oh. John knows how to copy and paste. Hey! … what I say on facebook, stays on facebook! Sheesh!

    Although, I think I'm kinda famous now…. so never mind. Ew… can we use a different word than 'juicing'? it just screams icky. :)

  • http://ramblingsofaspiritualidiot.blogspot.com/ Julia

    John, Dennis and Latoya were hanging out together when suddenly–

  • http://www.epcomm.com/ddawson Dennis Dawson

    Grapes…oranges…pomegranates…infuse me, enthuse me, juicy muse! (…Steroids…?)

  • Richard Lubbers

    That’s the trigger. Please don’t pu Whoa! Jesus?

  • Cathy

    He said, “Though you have dealt treacherously with me, Return!”

  • http://www.epcomm.com/ddawson Dennis Dawson

    Withered corpses, corruptly inspired, rise, RISE, smacking their pocked lips.

  • Latoya

    John, when will this contest end???

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    Oh, Latoya. Must you continue to prove to me that you never actually READ my posts?

    I had such hope for you.

  • http://living3dfaith.blogspot.com/ Tim

    Trying to open a vein, I popped and flew away.

  • http://living3dfaith.blogspot.com/ Tim

    Far author who art a heathen, Hollywood be thy name.

  • Latoya

    Hey! You JUST added the due date! Its so unfair that I cant actually prove that even if it’s true. [-(

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    And yet we have the below, lifted off my FB page on MONDAY.

    Latoya, Latoya, Latoya. I just don’t know anymore…

    Casey Oliver there’s a 127 responses on your contest… and it’s still open for 10 more days. You live dangerously. haha

    Mon at 7:30pm · Comment · Like / Unlike · View Feedback (3)Hide Feedback (3) · See Wall-to-Wall

  • Latoya

    DId i tell you that I dont like you anymore? Just in case i didnt, I dont like you anymore

  • http://www.epcomm.com/ddawson Dennis Dawson

    She said “I don’t like you anymore.” Passions were ignited!

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    Now, Layotya, you can’t hate everyone who proves you wrong. I think we can all agree that for you that would be an especially burdensome approach to life.

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    Jennifer: EW!!! (But intriguing!)

  • Latoya

    LOL! John, I disint even mention the word hate. Hate is a very strong word. Plus my hubby proves me wrong more than anyone else and I wove him soooo much :) And please dont spoil my name sir, thank you very much.

    Dennis, you are really juicing everything for ideas. LOL

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    Yeah, Dennis: Quit juicing everything.

  • http://www.epcomm.com/ddawson Dennis Dawson

    Unwed Mozart, the great decomposer, leads the ghastly undead parade.

  • Samantha

    EmAaRrTsH. Two worlds collide.

  • Samantha

    He yelled. She yelled. Then darkness. 'Bang!' Who shot who?

  • Gary Sather

    He placed the help wanted ad, then called the coroner.

  • Gary Sather

    Healthcare Reform. Second only to laughter, the real best medicine.

  • Samantha

    Goldilocks arrived. Slup, crash, zzz. Then the bears came home.

  • Samantha

    *Spelling error on last post.

    Goldilocks arrived. Slurp, crash, zzz. Then the bears came home.

  • Samantha

    Red! Orange! Yellow! Green! Blue! Indigo! Violet! The rainbow created.

  • http://mymenandme.wordpress.com Janelle

    She lifted her suitcase, dropped the burning match, and left.

  • Josh Magill

    Born. Missed father! Joined Air Force. Married, had seven. Cancer – died.

  • http://ruggleswright.wordpress.com Ruggles Wright

    From the sky the answer to all rained limpid. Jazzercise!

  • http://Alfaro.web.officelive.com Barbara Alfaro

    The witch who had all the mirrors covered was surprised.

  • http://www.princehanniel.blogspot.com Prince Hanniel

    Wanna know why I don't date hippos, cockroaches and eggs?

  • Suzy Amis Haines

    Thirteen. A dangerous year. Woodstock, Viet Nam, first love, heartbreak.

  • http://ramblingsofaspiritualidiot.blogspot.com/ Julia

    Testing one two three…

  • http://ramblingsofaspiritualidiot.blogspot.com/ Julia

    Let's see if this takes this time:

    Paradise. Family. Betrayal. Sadness. Exodus. Wondering. Sanctuary. Rebirth. Return. Healing.

  • http://animbilivens.blogspot.com Casey

    He stood ready with the sniper rifle. school was out.

  • http://www.screwtype.com Lucas

    Adult dancer seeks communications director: must have Congressional office experience.

  • joehurrycreations

    We must feed the sky kitten. Think quickly!

  • Stacy Chaplin

    Mango ideas Squeak In an interesting way

  • http://ramblingsofaspiritualidiot.blogspot.com/ Julia

    A dear friend passed, our tears flow as does love….

  • http://theskinhorse.wordpress.com theskinhorse

    I think it is important to update the all-too-common tale that pushes specific gender roles, sexual orientation and common misconceptions.

    *****

    The knight completed the rescue.

    “You killed George!” Princess wept.

    ******

    Help wanted: ‘Save princess from dragon! *female champions preferred.

    *****

    Save Queen from dragon! Apply within (gay knights only).

    *****

    Princess had to choose. Frankly, she knew the dragon better.

    *****

    Princess had to choose. Dragon smirked. Yeah, Stockholm Syndrome.

  • Kimberly Onufrock-Br

    Bright lights,loathing wilted magazines next to dingy worn chairs.

  • Kimberly Onufrock-Br

    Dust on the window sill as the door creaked open.

  • Kimberly Onufrock-Br

    Drops of rain on her face,it blended with tears.

  • Kimberly Onufrock-Br

    She flicked the dog hairs off her wool coat nonchalantly.

  • Kimberly Onufrock-Br

    Her heart felt colder than the ice on the wipers.

  • Kimberly Onufrock-Br

    Flaws like toes,were many ,as she disrobed casually.

  • Kimberly Onufrock-Br

    Giggles from the room filled the spaces of her soul.

  • Adam Roger Kearley

    The prologue, the beginning, the middle, the end. The epilogue.

  • http://noisycolorfullively.wordpress.com Monica

    Diagnosis: conception improbable. I heard: opportunity to foster the broken.

  • http://noisycolorfullively.wordpress.com Monica

    He entered dirty, alone: "Hi mama." Hi baby. Welcome home.

  • http://noisycolorfullively.wordpress.com Monica

    Sixteen: scared he'd notice my blushing. Hoped desperately he would.

  • Zach Stewart

    Life's work on sale; Cheap. Cannot sustain any further production.

  • Kimberly Onufrock-Br

    Chances were few,the gun was locked and loaded.

  • Kimberly Onufrock-Br

    Gingerly she fingered the scarf, then pulling tight, color drained.

  • http://facebook Dolores

    Wanted: Strict Vegan Chef

    Peanuts Prohibited

    fowl forbidden

    hours flexible.

  • http://noisycolorfullively.wordpress.com Monica

    I placed her child in her arms and drove away.

  • http://noisycolorfullively.wordpress.com Monica

    The father he never knew wants custody. Felony charges. Impossible.

  • Patti

    Patience is a matter of time.

  • Patti

    The mirror that was you.

  • http://www.patheos.com/blogs/johnshore/2009/09/20/10-words-or-less-short-story-contest/ Chris

    if he loved her truly, then why did he hurt her so.

  • http://www.patheos.com/blogs/johnshore/2009/09/20/10-words-or-less-short-story-contest/ Chris

    if god is merciful then why do people have to die?

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    Chris: Good, but STOP. You're too late.

  • http://www.patheos.com/blogs/johnshore/2009/09/20/10-words-or-less-short-story-contest/ Chris

    an angel getting rejected caused the forest fires in california.

  • John Edwards

    The man drove away as the town burned behind him

  • http://Margaret@Pikovsky.plus.com Margot

    She was my best friend until she stole my husband.

  • Wei-hsin

    She left without any desire.

  • http://www.johnshore.wordpress.com John Shore

    Wei-hsin: I LOVE this one! If it had come in on time (I am sorry, but the contest is now closed), I might have picked this one as the winner.

  • http://AnniversaryofaDictator Eric Dreyer Smith

    At two he was terrible, at sixty-two much worse.

  • BigBob

    “The Pen is BLUE!”, shouted Wendel. Francklin’s rebuttle “Hell Naw!”

  • Kevin Gibbons

    Well, goodbye then. (Read: I love you)

  • derek

    Trillions of worlds, infinite lives, and God is with me.


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