Want to this year spread so much holiday cheer that even your boss is sure to commend you for it? Then show up to work, every day for twelve days in a row, dressed like a different character from The Twelve Days of Christmas !
Here are some simple costume ideas to help you make this classic Christmas carol come alive for you, your co-workers, and all of the people sure to point and stare at you on the street.
Partridge in pear tree: Cut your hair in the fun unishag style that David Cassidy so rocked on the old Partridge Family TV show.
Fill your pockets with pears and tree bramble. Done. (While in the company of your less astute co-workers, you may want to sing the classic Partridge Family hit, “I Think I Love You!” to make sure they’re totally clear on what you’re doing.)
Turtle dove: Buy about a dozen of those little pet store turtles. Put some Super Glue on the shell of each. Attach turtles to clothes. Put on a long-sleeve shirt; cover your arms with Elmer’s glue; jam both of your arms into a down pillow you’ve cut open. Go.
French hen: Don a beret. Say nothing but “wee-wee! (sp?)” for the entire day. Also put eggs in all of your pockets.
Golden ring: Cover every inch of your body and clothing gold spray paint. Put your cell phone in your pocket. Program your desk or home phone to continuously call your cell phone. Do not answer your cell phone when it rings.
Goose a-laying: Attach feathers to clothes. Lie on floor.
Swan a-swimming: Attach feathers to clothes. Fill up employee break-room sink with water. While making loud honking noises, splash everyone who walks by.
Maid a-milking: Skip this one. No need to act so unprofessionally that you actually get fired. I mean, c’mon. It’s a song.
Lady dancing: Wig and fake breasts optional for guys. Flowing skirt not.
Lord a-leaping: Dress as much as possible like this guy:
Jump a lot.
Piper piping: Bring a bunch of pipe to work. Pretend to be installing it around everyone’s desk and cubicle.
Drummer drumming: Bring a drum of your own, or bring drumsticks. But drum like crazy on everything in the office.
Done! Write me and let me know how it goes! And remember: bloggers are not liable in lawsuits for wrongful termination!