Good point! I should blog more about current events. And what better time to blog about current events than right now?
Let me go look at the headlines that are, at this moment (11 p.m. Saturday, June 26, 2010) on the front page of the website of The New York Times. This’ll be fun!
The top story–the one right in the middle-top of the page, with the big photo–is headlined, “The New Power of Petite Women.” My wife, to whom I’ve been married almost 30 years, is five-feet, two inches tall. Today, while we were in a Nordstrom, she went off to buy some stuff, and when she came back to where she thought I would be waiting for her, she found that I wasn’t there. When a short while later we basically ran into each other near the escalators, she expressed her displeasure at not having been able to find me earlier by slugging me in the chest. Hard. In my entire life, I don’t think I’ll ever run across a news article I need to read less than I do, “The New Power of Petite Women.”
The second biggest story on the front page of NYT–the big left-hand column story–is headlined, “With Financial Overhaul Near, Lobbying Shifts to Regulations.” I’m sure thisssssssszzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
The third biggest story is titled, “Leaders at Summit Talks Turn Attention to Deficit Cuts.” Is the NYT just trying to hurt me? Have I done something to offend that paper? Or are they simply major stockholders in the No Doz company? This stuff would slip a zombie into a coma. Let me go look for another front page story while I can still move my hands.
Next, I see, we have, “Insurance Pools Readied in Some States.” In the comments thread of a post earlier this week, I mentioned how I’d like to buy a handgun to keep for protection of my home. I wish I had a handgun right now. I’d kill myself with it.
Next headline: “Overture to Taliban Jolts Afghan Minorities.” Gee, what a surprise. A group in the Middle East is being offended by something a different group in the Middle East is doing or will do or might do or did do or sort of did 10,000 years ago. I better give my mind a chance to wrap itself around this startling story before I delve into the shocking details of it.
The next story I see is, “Guineans Revel in Prospect of First Free Vote.”
I hate my life.